California Sunshine -- Special Feature for Thanks Giving Thursday

I had to make a little trip into L.A. today and thought I would bring a little of the joy home to share with you. A little sand and sun fix . . .

Thanks Giving Thursday

This week's Thanks Giving Thursday post will be a special feature posted late Thursday evening rather than in the wee hours of Thursday morning as usual. Please come back and visit for a little something special.

Wacky Wednesday -- It's a Tough Job

From Reuters.com

Parents beat up principal over grades
Mon Mar 5, 2007 3:00PM EST

BARI, Italy (Reuters) - An irate Italian family beat up a principal because they were unhappy with the grades a young relative had received and a ban on cell phones at school.

Wacky Wednesday -- And Now for Your Viewing Pleasure . . .

Monty Python and the Holy Grail in Lego

Toddler Files Tuesday -- Whatever It Is You Think You See Becomes a Pair of Shoes to Me

It seems like yesterday she pulled up and began walking. Then I bent over to put the dishes in the washer and turned around and found Baby K had put on her girlie pink moon boots all on her own.

Twenty months old and the girl loves shoes. Shoes. Shoes. Oh, the glories of shoes!

All pretty things were meant to be shoes. Baby K will and does put any pretty thing on her feet. It's like a Tootsie Roll commercial. Whatever it is you think you see becomes a pair of shoes to her. Green stacking ring? No silly! It's a sporty wedge. Empty Tupperware container? No my dear, it's a classic loafer. Colorful butterfly teething ring? Obviously, it's a strappy sandal. Even the coloring book? Clearly a casual flat.

But this time, she got it right. She put on her own shoes, all by herself. I can't help but feel we're embarking on a venturesome journey.

Potty Train -- What's In a Name

Lest you think I am a prude based on my previous post about "sh_t," I should share with you that I am a big fan of George Carlin's "Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television," a routine brought to mind by the whole potty training experience. Afterall, there are so many words associated with the potty that are just not acceptable in polite company. I mean, it's not good to be a "potty mouth."

I have read several blog entries recently about the importance of teaching our daughters the anatomically correct word "vagina," and I agree. When it comes to what to call our bums however, the path is less clear. Therefore, I am hard at work preparing a list of contenders for the title in our home. These are the current front-runners:

1) heinie -- my personal favorite
2) fanny -- fun choice, but also the name of a great aunt, which taints its appeal
3) hams -- interesting what you find in the thesaurus
4) rear -- more a location, don't you think?
5) rump -- cute, but also descriptive of a roast
6) bum -- cheeky, I like it
7) backside -- scary, makes me think of someone saying, "I'll tan yer backside."
8) posterior -- rather complicated
9) booty -- shake it! shake it!
10) groove-thing -- 70's flashback

Mombot Monday -- Special Recipe Flashback

Cranberries offer a refreshing tartness, good not just for winter, but also springtime dishes. This yummy and simple recipe for Cranberry Sauce makes a delicious treat over toasted English muffins.


We eat cranberries once or twice a year and every time I think, "We should do this more often." I was a little intimidated by them as a cook until last year when I made my first cranberry sauce. It's actually very simple. So I am sharing my own recipe for anyone who, like me, has ever been intimidated by cranberries.

Easy Cranberry Sauce Recipe

Ingredients:

-1 cup fresh cranberries, washed and drained
-1 medium green apple, cored and chopped into half-inch pieces
-1/3 medium orange chopped into half-inch pieces, leave rind on
-1 cup carbonated limeade beverage (12 ounces of 7Up or Sprite may be substituted)
-ground cinnamon to taste
-ground nutmeg to taste




Directions:

Place all ingredients in sauce pan over medium heat. Cook with lid on until sauce begins to simmer. Remove lid and simmer, stirring occasionally, until cranberries pop open. Remove from heat. Serve hot over toasted English muffins or your favorite breakfast pastry, or serve cold along with turkey or ham.

And They Call Him Senator

I have been repeatedly embarrassed by remarks made by Senator James Inhofe (R-Okla.) from my home state of Oklahoma. This is the man who continues to claim man-made global warming is "the greatest hoax ever perpetrated on the American people." Frankly, I thought he could no longer disappoint me. Then he came up with this:

from
Washingtonpost.com
But Did Ginger Rogers Wear Flip-Flops?

By Dana Milbank
Saturday, March 3, 2007; Page A02

Sen. Jim Inhofe (R-Okla.) got the crowd cheering early in the day. "I have been called -- my kids are all aware of this -- dumb, crazy man, science abuser, Holocaust denier, villain of the month, hate-filled, warmonger, Neanderthal, Genghis Khan and Attila the Hun," he announced. "And I can just tell you that I wear some of those titles proudly."

*Thanks to Daily Kos for picking this up. Visit Daily Kos directly to view the ensuing discussion in comments.

Thanks Giving Thursday -- On Being a Slacker Mommy

Easy is good. I like things easy, like Bisquick Complete. Just add water, shake it, and it makes pancakes. Well, you do have to actually pour them on a griddle and cook them, but still. If that's too much for you, you can buy frozen buttermilk pancakes and heat them in your microwave. Seriously! They sell these.

Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches? You can buy them at the grocery store ready made. They even cut the crusts off. They're called Uncrustables.

Remember when you had to buy peanut butter and jelly in separate jars, open two jars, dip the knife in each and spread it on bread. Man, what a drag. Well, not anymore. Goober Grape to the rescue.

All winners in my book because they are time savers. And as we all know, time is not a renewable resource.

But the thing that really makes a slacker mommy's life complete is convenience cleaning products. I know, "slacker mommy" and "cleaning" might not seem to go together at first blush. But let's face it, if you have kids, you've got to clean. Heaven knows there's nothing a toddler enjoys more than trying to give you a heart attack by finding that one brown mystery glob you missed and leaning over to lick it off the floor.

Convenience cleaning products are the bomb, because after all, every minute I don't spend cleaning is another minute I can spend buffing my nails, eating ice cream bonbons and reading upscale fashion mags. Uhm, sorry slipped off into Never Never Gonna Happen Land momentarily. So, as I was saying, convenience cleaning products rock my world. And, drum roll please, I have found my favorite. The Lifetime Achievement Award for All Convenience Cleaning Products goes to Pampers Clean n Play Wipes.

They clean everything. AND they're even safe for cleaning things baby might (read inevitably will) put in her mouth. Great for highchairs. Cleans glass without streaking. Works like a charm on stove tops. Good for cleaning grime off of walls. Lovely on counter tops and chrome. If it can't be cleaned with a Pampers Clean n Play Wipe, it pretty much shouldn't be cleaned. Well, except for baby. They're not safe to use to clean the actual baby, but other than that, they're pretty much perfect.

(*I am not receiving any sort of reward for this gushy spiel about Pampers Clean n Play Wipes. I really just find them that exciting. Look out, soon I might be asking for a new washing machine for my anniversary.)

Wacky Wednesday -- Back to Mussel Beach

BBC News
Wales
Tuesday, 27 February 2007

Mussel's first class sea return
A shellfish has been returned to the sea off the coast of Anglesey after being posted "home" from Shropshire.

The mussel had been picked up by five-year-old Alastair Thornton from Church Stretton whilst on holiday.

His mother contacted an Anglesey website asking for advice to save it . . .

Toddler Files Tuesday -- The Incredible Floating Rump

The amazing butt-in-the-air sleeping position is well-documented by moms everywhere. You know the one, where baby's bottom is so precariously high it seems the child is destined to topple at any moment.

How do they do this? Now that I'm 37, I'm wondering how they even get the thing up that high without throwing their backs out, much less how they sleep that way.

The crazy thing is, it seems to be a comforting position. Had a big tantrum? Teething? Hoist your heinie in the air, fall asleep, and you'll feel much better.

Who knows how they do it. I'm quite sure I would fall out of my bed if I tried. (You can tell I've considered it.) At the very least, I would wake up unable to stand upright for several days.

Ah yes, to be a toddler again, to fall asleep with my fanny aloft, wear spaghetti sauce on my shirt with pride, and be endlessly amused by random things dropped on the floor.

Mombot Monday -- Keeping It Real, Not Ironing Sheets

My tip for the week? Let's be real. Despite the advice delivered on Oprah this past week, I do not iron my sheets twice a week. In fact, I doubt I will ever iron my sheets, because frankly, I would rather read a book, go for a walk, or volunteer at a homeless shelter. By comparison, ironing my sheets twice a week? Just seems like not such a high priority.

As parents, we constantly face the pressure of the clock. We are constantly prioritizing, then adapting and reprioritizing. There is always one more thing to be done that could make life better. Exercise more. Weed the flower beds. Cook meals from scratch. Grow a garden. Ironing sheets just doesn't appeal to me as adding that much to the greater good.

Maybe ironing sheets is your thing. Maybe it makes you totally happy. If so, more power to you, but if not, don't stress over it. In the grand scheme of things, tasks like ironing sheets and folding a fitted sheet into a perfect square don't have that much impact on life.

Here's my suggestion, each time you feel guilty about not ironing your sheets, or some other such thing, just think of the positive thing you did during the time you could have spent ironing sheets. For example, instead of ironing my sheets today, I walked to the park with my daughters.

I'll choose the walk to the park every time.

Potty Train -- Peezza

It's funny how toddler skills transfer from one area to another. It appears this week we have been blessed by the ability to say the word "pee." Anything that sounds like pee is now known as pee. For example, when we ordered pizza this week, the girls delighted at the arrival of the "pee." No matter that I called it "Pizza." Clearly, it was "pee."

"Pee! Pee!" they exclaimed as I carried two deliciously warm pizza boxes into the kitchen.

"Pee, Pee, Pee," as they went into the highchairs. Someone who didn't know them would have assumed I was making a huge mistake by placing them in their highchairs at that exact moment.

"Pee!" as I cut up the pizza.

And "pee," they sighed as I placed it on their trays.

Maybe we'll go out to eat at a peezza buffet soon, or maybe we'll just drop by for entertainment.

Mombot Monday -- Follow Up

As a follow up to last week's Mombot Monday article about online learning, the animated header above (imperfect as it is) is one I designed by learning from these helpful folks:

Jon Armstrong -- http://www.blurbomat.com/archives/2006/10/31/ (Photoshop tips from Dooce's husband)

Helpful Bloggers -- http://groups.google.com/group/blogger-help/search?q=header+photobucket&start=10&sa=N& (Blogger Help Group messages re implementing new headers)

Russell Brown -- http://www.russellbrown.com/ (Photoshop tips from an Adobe guru)

Janee -- http://www.myjanee.com/tuts/animation/animation.htm (Easy animation instructions)

If you would like more information, just leave me a comment and will be happy to post a more detailed explanation of the steps I followed.

Political Pop

Half a week was spent discussing the inconsequential details of a minor dispute between the Obama and Clinton campaigns. Sadly some major news broadcasters do as much news creating as they do news reporting, repeating the same story ten times or more in one day. It's like journalistic brainwashing.

Should what one Barack Obama supporter said about Hillary Clinton really be headline news? Does it impact the issues? Does it impact who either candidate is or their positions on issues? No. Period.

In this situation, however, the supporter was a wealthy Hollywood power player. CNN, in particular, jumped at the opportunity to add some glitz and drama to the challengingly dry political arena by focusing on something other than the issues. It's like watching reporting perfectly attuned to the interests of 12-year-old gossiping girls.

If I recall correctly, another one of their top stories recently was that Donatella Versace said Hillary Clinton should wear skirts instead of pants. People, leave it alone. If there's no political news to report that you feel the American public would be interested in, then don't report any, but for Heaven's sake, don't just make some up. Donatella Versace said Hillary Clinton shouldn't wear pants? That's not news. Let me help you with the distinction. If Prime Minister Blair said President Bush shouldn't wear pants, that would be news.

What will be next in political news? This week's journalistic feeding frenzy will occur in Hollywood, centered around the Oscars. So we might expect some political news to come from there as well.

The audience viewing the Oscars is larger, I'm guessing, and vastly more tuned-in than the audience for political campaigns. It's only logical to believe messages delivered there have potential to have more impact than those delivered via traditional modes of political communication. So, don't be surprised if your favorite actor delivers his or her own political message along with an acceptance speech, as has happened in the past, because the fact is we remain insatiable consumers of political pop.

Perfume

The right scent wafts me away. Perfume is my innocent escape. It's one of the things that defines me as me and not just mom-me.

When I was pregnant, nothing smelled good. Except maybe pickles. On nachos. From 7-Eleven. But now, welcome home, fragrance my friend.

Scents that are earthy and warm appeal to me most, scents like musk and sandalwood, scents that say, "I'm crunchy, but sexy, in an I-shave-my-underarm-hair kind of way."

Gourmand scents can be lovely too, with notes of cinnamon or vanilla. If I wasn't afraid of smelling like a freshly baked pie, I just might sprinkle a little nutmeg behind my ears and go.

The right florals can be nice, although I'm much more picky about those. I don't want to smell like I've been doused in Grandmother's rose water, but I do love the intoxicating scent of Jasmine.

What makes my blood rush though is the ultimate, the complex ambery scent that brings it all to a climax in one enveloping aromatherapy party, the one crafted by an expert perfumer and rare enough that once a man associates it with you, he will think only of you whenever he smells it. That my friends is perfume. Va-va-va-voom.

Wacky Wednesday -- Bogged Down by Beanie Babies

From The Muskegon Chronicle
Not so warm and fuzzy: Burglar nabs 145 Beanie Babies
Monday, February 19, 2007

By Lisa Medendorp
lmedendorp@muskegonchronicle.com

The getaway car -- loaded with 145 purloined Beanie Babies -- got stuck in the snow early Saturday in Norton Shores.

Not willing to lose his loot, the alleged Beanie Baby burglar got a pickup truck from a friend's home, drove back to the intersection of Worden Street and Sunbury Avenue and tossed the stuffed critters into the truck bed.

What the 37-year-old suspect didn't know was that Norton Shores police were already on the way . . .

from The Toddler Files

You can create your own card at Blyberg.net. Thanks to Jerusalem at My Little Life for the great find.

Potty Train -- Next Stop Disinterestedville

The potty has lost its charm. Interest has been flushed away. I'm trying to follow their cues, trying to learn the ever elusive natural potty schedule. We'll keep trying, but I won't pressure them. I've been told by every mommy I know the dangers of too much focus on the potty, so we're easing up, but not giving up.

(To see the Potty Train animation, just click here.)

Framing the Issues -- Iraq -- What Will Work in '08

The Republican Party's success over the past several years, until the November election, was due in large part to their framing of the issues. Their concern about facts and positions was secondary because they picked the issues to be discussed. It was a marvelous strategy and worked with amazing success. It had only one flaw. It was interrupted by reality.

It seemed Republicans had the magic formula for winning votes. They simply found the common denominator among key groups, issues strong enough, emotionally charged enough, to make people abandon loyalty to their other long-standing beliefs to secure their future with regard to that one precious issue. They were the masters of the single-issue campaign, and fear was their key motivator.

Fear is one of the basest emotions, at the root of survival instincts. When it is appealed to, it is one of the most effective motivators. Republicans became masters at framing campaign issues in fear.

Vote for Republicans. We're for Homeland Security.

"Homeland Security" -- a brilliant marketing term. If they could have bottled it and sold it, it would have made them billions of dollars.

Who could have watched the events of 9/11 and not felt fear for ourselves and for our nation? We all experienced trauma, in a way many had never before and in a way we may never again. The Republican strategy seized on that weakness, like a master manipulator, and used it rather than healing it. Regardless of whether you view this as opportunism at its worst or the only way to save our nation, the fact is it worked. At least it worked for a time.

Initially, when someone raised an objection to the Bush Administration's approach to The War on Terror, domestic surveillance or the Iraq War, Republicans simply waived the Homeland Security flag, said anyone who opposed them was unpatriotic and rather dismissively said, "Go away."

The Bush Administration and its followers badmouthed, spied upon, arrested and even blacklisted people who dared to express opposing views. It was all quite McCarthy-esque.

But little beams of light did break through. Reality persisted. It's kind of annoying that way. The Administration attempted to maintain a choke hold on much of the media. They used innovative techniques such as "embedding" journalist with troops, making them one of the team fighting the war and therefore emotionally embedded as well. They used old standards such as intimidation and revealing government secrets to control people's public speech. Nonetheless, little bits of accurate information made it through the media and into the stream of public consciousness. Reality is just so annoying that way.

Eventually, it became clear to the vast majority of people, undeniable even for President Bush, that the war in Iraq is going badly. Unfortunately, that CNN footage of IED's repeatedly blowing American military vehicles to pieces, with American men and women inside, does nothing to bolster our image of Homeland Security.

Expert after expert has come forward declaring the Iraq War has disintegrated into Civil War. Our efforts may have destabilized the region to a great degree, fostering the strengthening of dangerous factions that are likely to remain long after American troops leave the arena, and creating a much greater threat to Homeland Security than the alleged WMD which were never found.

Americans are worn out by fear. They want a way forward that will work. They are tired of threats of failure used to control.

Before the war, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice acknowledged that "there will always be some uncertainty" in determining how close Iraq may be to obtaining a nuclear weapon and stressed, "We don't want the smoking gun to be a mushroom cloud."

Now President Bush warns, "If we do not defeat these enemies now, we will leave our children to face a Middle East overrun by terrorist states and radical dictators armed with nuclear weapons."

Americans want, need, are yearning for, a positive way forward. The key is hope, not dire predictions and threats.

Enter Obama. This is where Obama's message has been wildly successful and will continue to be so. The presentation of his message is always positive.

Barack Obama may or may not be the winner in '08, but whoever the winner is will learn from his message. The winner will have a plan, although it need not be complicated, voters are rarely interested in details, and an identifiable goal, revealing the way to an obviously attainable successful conclusion.

Fear will always be a motivator, but the leader who shows voters the path to success, the way to triumph over fear, will win in '08.

That Crazy Tamiflu

Something at the end of a Tamiflu commercial today caught my attention. It went something like, "Patients should be watched for signs of confusion and unusual behaviour after taking Tamiflu blah blah blah." I took a look at the web site and found this:

Some incidences of self-injury and delirium with the use of TAMIFLU in patients with the flu have been reported (mostly from Japan). The reports were primarily among children. The relationship of these reported events to TAMIFLU is not known. Pediatric patients with the flu should be closely monitored for signs of abnormal behavior throughout the treatment period.

Oh sure, it will cure your flu, but it will make you crrraaazyy. But really it's okay because most of the people who have wigged out have been Japanese children. Yeah, you know those crazy Japanese kids.

What?!?!

Personally, I would rather have the flu.

Friday Fun -- Gustafer for Fun

Click here to explore Gustafer's lovely life and home. See if you can find the mint green bee and the cookie recipe.

Want a quick summary on Gustafer? Click to watch the video below.

Thanks Giving Thursday -- Maurine

Maurine was one of my Mimi's best friends. In my mind, as a child, they could have both been my grandmothers, loving, cuddling and doting.

Maurine could bring out the best in anyone. She believed the best of everyone.

If there is such a thing as karma, she must have loads of good karma. She could leave a diamond ring by a bathroom sink at a restaurant, go back later, and it would be waiting because someone found it and thought to themselves, "I should take this lovely diamond ring and turn it in. Someone surely will want it back." What was even better was that Maurine believed it would be there.

Tonight as I lay on the MRI table, mind adrift, a comforting scent came to me and brought her to mind. It smelled like her house. I walked through it in my mind. Through the front door. Then to the left and hiding under the piano with her red-headed grandson Rob. Into the living room and looking at the couch along the wall. Back to the back of the house and to the right into the kitchen. Past the kitchen sink to the shelves just at child height. I see a little plaque and it reads, "God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference."

There in her kitchen I feel at peace knowing she will be home soon. Breast cancer will take her there. She has had the serenity to accept it, the courage to face it, and the wisdom to accomplish it all with grace.

Happy Valentine's Day

Valentine Animation by Jlaruby

Wacky Wednesday -- In my day it would have been hairspray . . .

In my day it would have been hairspray (think 80's and big hair bands) . . .

Teens turn out to be underarmed and dangerous...
Mon Feb 12, 2007 3:57PM EST
From Reuters.com

BERLIN (Reuters) - A group of young German women used so much spray deodorant in the bathroom of a North Sea youth hostel that it set off a fire alarm and brought the local fire brigade rushing to the rescue . . .

Toddler Files Tuesday

This week the Toddler Files Tuesday post will appear Tuesday evening rather than Tuesday morning.

The Mother Lode -- Thanks Cool Mom Picks

Cool Mom Picks sent me this great gob of goodies just for posting their Holiday Gift Guide button, the button I posted simply because they have truly great finds. I had no idea I could win prizes too. Bonus!

My fave from the whole bunch, the Skip*Hop Saddlebag in pink camo:



From the Skip*Hop website:

n. sad·dle·bag
1. One of a pair of pouches hanging across the back of a horse behind the saddle.
2. A pouch hanging from a saddle or over the rear wheel of a motorcycle or bicycle.
3. A stylin’ pouch from Skip Hop that attaches to the sides of nearly any stroller.

Check the cool karate pants from Beasty Baby. If only the "Cranky" pants came in my size . . .




I love this adorable lavender tee from Emotional Armor. Guess what. These come in mommy size.



From Mommytrackd, came these nifty eat sheets -- menu planner and grocery list all in one. Where have these been all my life?



Tired of picking up sippy cups off the sidewalk? Boy, am I. I can't wait to try this one. Drop Stop, from Atea Kids, is designed to prevent baby paraphernalia such sippy cups and teething rings from making their way to the ground.



Last, not least, this lovely lavender scented Head-to-Toe Baby Wash from Bug & Pickle, is a treat for the whole family. The scent is soft enough for baby, masculine enough for dad and fresh enough for mom.



Thanks Cool Mom Picks!

Potty Train -- A Step in the Right Direction

"Hhhmmm. Pee-pee. Uh-oh."

Progress! Baby K uttered the words above as we drove to the bookstore today for a family outing. I never thought I would be so happy to hear my child tell me she wet herself, but it really seems like progress. While we still are not making many pees and poos in the potty, the girls are becoming more aware of what is going on with their bodies. I hope that is a big step in the right direction.

Mombot Monday -- No Thanks to $9 Dish Soap

I love Restoration Hardware. Their products are classically designed, and comparatively speaking, not terribly expensive.

When I received their Early Spring 2007 catalog recently, I enjoyed a quick fantasy run through it. Although I found lots to love, I just couldn't help but find the humor in the $42 soap and lotion "3-Piece Caddy" seen here:



A bit pricey for three plastic bottles of dish soap, hand soap and lotion, don't you think? While I don't mind paying Restoration Hardware prices for the quality they offer in more significant items such as sofas or bed linens, I just can't see paying $16 for Restoration Hardware Dryer Sheets or $9 for Restoration Hardware scented dish soap. I mean, do I really need my dishes to be scented? No, I think not.



But I do love the look of the simple little soap and lotion caddy pictured above. Here's my solution and tip of the week. Peruse the catalogs of the places you love and learn which less expensive stores imitate their style. You can invest in quality for significant items like artwork and furniture and save a little on things that are less noticeable, such as dish soap and dryer sheets.

I found a similar soap and lotion caddy at World Market for $15. Granted it has a slightly different look, but for a price difference of nearly $30, that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.



World Market and Pier 1 Imports often carry goods very similar to current offerings of Restoration Hardware. Their prices are lower, and you can find some great deals on sale.

Live, Learn, Listen -- The State of Black and White America

"I have a dream" still rings in the ears of those who believe in an integrated society. Brown v. Board of Education of Topeka revealed the concept of separate, but equal schools as a farce and made it legally unacceptable. In most places, however, the reality is we still have separate schools, only under a different guise, and they are not equal.

We have separate churches and separate neighborhoods -- separate lives. Black and white America live in separate realities, a fact that makes genuine understanding a true challenge on either side.

With that in mind, regardless of your race, I would like to direct your attention to The State of Black America hosted by Tavis Smiley which aired this week on C-SPAN. Participants include: Douglas Wilder, former Governor of Virginia; Cathy Hughes, Radio One Founder and President; The Reverend Jesse Jackson; The Reverend Al Sharpton; Sonia Sanchez, poet; and others.

In law school, I was privileged to take a course called Race, Racism and the Law, taught by Professor Anita Hill. Perhaps the most important lesson I learned was that people's positions are not always what you anticipate. If you read about something, you can learn to think about it, but if you live something, you truly learn it. If you can't live it, you can at least listen to someone who has lived it.

To view The State of Black America hosted by Tavis Smiley as aired on C-SPAN, just click here or click here to go to the C-SPAN.org page featuring their recent video archives, scroll down and click on the program title.

Even Their Dog Was Staring

The girls and I picked up these lovely new toys today at World Market. So shiny and pretty and impliedly smart too, because I mean look at it, it has a globe inside. Oh, and it spins too, like a real spinning globe. And it's surrounded by little flashing lights. It's spectacular. The best toy ever. Why? Because it has hypnotic powers. I don't know what it's called, but it should be called the Incredible Toddler Hypno-Ray. Works like a dream.

And we got two of them. Yay!

Naturally, when the girls became cranky just before bath time, the obvious solution was for me to do a little Incredible Toddler Hypno-Ray dance. Of course they work best in the dark, so I turned out the lights in the room and pretended to direct a plane coming in for landing. Then dancing with crazy, flashing maracas. Next flaming torches in a native island dance. Soon I was a one woman light show for the Rolling Stones.





It was about that time I looked over and realized the curtains were open and a family of three was stopped in their tracks on the walking path behind our home. Even their dog was staring. Apparently too troubled to move until they had satisfied themselves I wasn't experiencing some sort of sequence of uncontrollable body spasms, they stood there expressionless, unwilling witnesses to my artistic interpretive dance.

When I confessed to my husband this evening, he suggested perhaps they were wondering if the show would be at the same time tomorrow night.

It's My Potty, I'll Sing If I Want To

People frequently ask how I manage with twins. Sometimes it's challenging. Sometimes it makes things easier. Today it was both.

Not long ago, I mentioned that we recently began potty training. Today was a banner day, three pee-pees in the potty and one almost poop.

The best part though was the girls' antics.

"Okay, let's go potty," brought instant smiles and a race to the bathroom door.

While Baby K sat on the potty "meditating," Baby Z would dance and sing the potty song for her. I have no idea what inspired her, but her sister loved it, and it seemed to work.

"Pee pee pee pee pee pee pee pee," she sang, smiling and spinning like a whirling dervish. And then her sister peed. And we all cheered and clapped.

Baby K was so pleased with the whole experience she wanted to give the toilet a big hug. When it flushed, she kept trying to lay her head on the lid and wrap her arms around the commode as the water swished beneath. Maybe it looked just a bit too much like a big kitty with that fuzzy toilet lid cover.

Wacky Wednesday -- Wow, He's Buff! Wait I Mean, In the Buff.

From USA TODAY, Dutch gym to introduce 'Naked Sunday' for naturists -- "AMSTERDAM (AP) — Self-conscious about what you wear while working out? A Dutch gym plans to introduce "Naked Sunday" for people who like to huff and puff in the buff."

For me, signing up for "Naked Sunday" would be enough inspiration in and of itself to get fit. It's bad enough that someone might have to see my extra-wide mommy fanny in Yoga class, but my naked extra-wide mommy fanny, now that would be really bad.

Potty Train -- I Found the Wrong Video. Did You Find the Right One?

I would like the same people who create Disney Channel's marketing to come to my house and potty train my children. I think they could get them to do anything. It's a little frightening really.

They don't have a mind control Disney video for potty training that I have been able to find, so Saturday, I bought Elmo's Potty Time. How could you go wrong with Sesame Street and Elmo? With the help of Sesame Street's Guess that Shape and Color, I have been teaching the girls shapes and colors already. Unfortunately, I didn't find the Elmo's Potty Time video nearly as helpful.

It was long on explanation and short on illustration. Perhaps it would be suitable for children quite a bit older with more language skills and longer attention spans. Our girls are expressing an interest in using the potty now, so this is not the video for them.

If you've found a potty training video you can recommend, I would love to hear about it.

Mombot Monday -- They Can Sense Weakness, You Know

It's true. Little children can sense weakness and smell fear too. Should you experience injury of any kind, do not show weakness. I repeat do not show weakness.

Upon returning home from my doctor's appointment with this lovely new accoutrement upon my foot, my darling baby girl with curly hair and big brown eyes and long eyelashes, took one look at me and knew I was easy prey.

She decided to test me by going for the cabinet door. When I told her "No, come here," she stared me in the eye, looked down at my injured foot, and then back up at me and told me "No."

When I took a step toward her, she prepared to run. She reminded me of a lioness stalking an injured gazelle. She knew instinctively that I was at a disadvantage.

She began to run.

And here is where I made my mistake. I showed weakness . . . and fear. I hobbled around my kitchen like a 1970's Weeble. I wobbled round and round, afraid I would fall down.

We circled the kitchen island at least twice before I realized this was going nowhere. I would have to pick up the pace. Once I caught her, she realized Mommy was still functional and the issue was resolved.

The Incredible Molly Ivins

When I heard the news on Thursday that Molly Ivins had died, I thought of the many great laughs and insights she had given us and mourned that there will never be another exactly like her.

Few are be able to wield the pen as she did, as both sword and feather, slicing to the heart of truth with a humorist's touch. The dance of politics and humor she choreographed, like a combination of ballet and stomp, was intelligent, artful and straight to the point.

No one could say it better than Ms. Ivins; therefore, I leave you with NPR's tribute, Treasuring the Wit and Wisdom of Molly Ivins, by Wade Goodwyn. It is ripe with interviews with and audio snippets of Ms. Ivins. Just Click Here.

The Polls Are Open

You can vote here for your favorite female bloggers in the Share the Love Awards.

My favorites, including my nominees, can be found in the Good Reading list to the right. I am sure they would love it if you would visit their blogs and have a look around. I am always interested in hearing about new blogs, so I would love to hear about your favorites too.

Football Bride, Not a Football Widow

Hubby and I met seven years ago seated around a television watching New Year's Day football games. His very smart sister invited me (recently un-engaged), four single guys, and her boyfriend to her place for a football bash with the intent of setting me up with someone. Apparently, I was very hot or they were very desperate, probably more of the latter, because I walked away with several options for dates and very, very flattered. It gave me the confidence to choose the hottest, smartest and most successful guy there, even though he was six years my junior. Two years later we were married. (And yes, we even tried to watch football on our honeymoon. Unfortunately television schedules in Dublin didn't cooperate.)

For ever after we will be football fans, and every time we watch a game it brings back memories of the way we met. Therefore, we must, nay are required to by the laws of heaven and nature, watch the Super Bowl.

Arguably the best part of the game is the Super Ads which you can enjoy on your own or with your football viewing partner by clicking here to view today's Super Bowl Ads.

Thanks Giving Thursday: Potty Train, All Aboard!

It's a Potty Train! (Hum Soul Train theme music here. If not old enough to remember, just substitute theme from Thomas the Tank Engine. It'll be fine.)

Thanks Ladies for the comments regarding yesterday's post. When it comes to potty training, I have been feeling a bit like I have been sucked into the swirling vortex of the toilet flush. Just then you came along and offered your hand. (Lovely imagery, eh?)

You have paid me one of the best compliments I can imagine by implying I might have a spec of something insightful to offer on this subject. So, today I am thankful for the camaraderie of my fellow potty training blogging mamas. Muchas gracias.

Here is my little smidge of insight. Let's all do this thing together. I would love to hear your insight too. The best advice I get on all things baby almost always comes from conversation with other mommy ladies.

I promise to post on the Potty Train on Mondays, and I hope you will come along for the adventure. Your two cents in advice is your ticket to ride.

All aboard! Please keep hands, feet and flailing toddlers inside the compartment at all times. It may be a bumpy ride.

*The idea is that the Monday Potty Train review will be a bit like the Weight Watchers weigh-in, where I lost, where I gained and where I flubbed and totally need your advice.

Wacky Wednesday -- Diaper Double Duty

We have just begun potty training at the House of ZoKai and already I am dreaming of what to do with the disposable diapers soon to be left high and dry.

Although I pride myself on the fact that I fashion a fine looking diaper hat, a girl can only wear so many hats. So what do with the rest? What to do? What to do?

I did a little research and found the following suggestions:

Microwaveable heating pad (Not so sure I would toss a diaper in my microwave, but OK.), keeping a plant watered longer by putting a diaper in the bottom of the pot, and packing material for shipment of fine china (Somehow that just seems wrong.) all from Extraordinary Uses for Ordinary Things from Reader's Digest RD.com.

You can even make a "diaper cake" for a baby shower as seen here.

Who knew?

Toddler Files Tuesday -- Chicken Grease Hair Grease and Other Beauty Secrets

My 18-month-old twin girls have a flare for beauty, especially at the dinner table. Their innovation and style are awe-inspiring.

Before them, I never knew:

Chicken grease makes a lovely hair pomade (hair grease).

A partially chewed chicken stick makes a lovely hair barrette.

Applesauce is intended to be worn on your eyebrows.

Bowls and spoons are simply tools of application.

Cheese is to be worn upon your head.

~and~

Strawberry-banana cereal bars make a lovely shade of lip color.


Who needs MAC when you have babies like these?

Achieving Nirvana

I have achieved nirvana. I weigh less than Tyra Banks.

I mean seriously, who could say she is fat? Look at her!

Hooray for Tyra Banks for standing up to the silly people who called her fat. Wouldn't we all like to be fat like that?

A review for you, or is it for me? Well, anyway . . .

Recently, one of my favorite bloggers and role models wrote a great book review. It got me thinking, maybe I should do a review. Then I went to the grocery store, and one thing led to another, and here we are.

I will review CHOCOLATE, Emily's Chocolate Covered Fortune Cookies. This is an entirely self-serving review I have burdened myself with simply because writing a review is as good an excuse as any to try new chocolate. (This is not an ad, nor will I receive any sort of compensation, other than rewarding myself with copious amounts of chocolate.)

The shiny, red Chinese take-out box caught my eye from the Valentine's Day display at the grocery store. (Shiny and red. Oh boy.)

So how are they? The sweet chocolate coating is complimented nicely by the crunchy and delicately sweet fortune cookie beneath. It is a nice change of pace from the average boring boxed chocolate you see every year.

The love message fortunes inside the cookies are a nice touch too, although not exquisitely inspiring.



The one criticism I have is that the chocolate is not the highest quality. It's clearly built to have a long shelf-life. Still, I must admit I was amused by the warning on the bottom of the box: Temperature Sensitive Chocolate. (Ah yes, as opposed to the non-temperature-sensitive chocolate that wouldn't melt if you held it directly over an open flame.)

All in all, the packaging and originality make for a cute gift for a special someone, even more so if combined with Chinese take-out and a good bottle of wine.

Mombot Monday -- When Specials Are Not Special

It's on special!

The special at a local grocery store this week was to sell my favorite brand of laundry detergent for 2 for $9 rather than 1 for $3.99.



Mombot tip of the week: Beware of the special. Just because the flyer says it is special does not mean it is. For example, I fell for this ad because it said 63 oz. to 100 oz. sizes were on special for 2 for $9. I assumed that must mean that the 100 oz. was on special for 2 for $9 because I knew the smaller size was regularly priced at $3.99. Oh yes, we all know what happens when we assume. So, I wasted my time.

Another time saver bonus tip, I try to make a mental note of which stores use this type of advertising frequently and avoid them all together. Although I noticed today, there are times when I might not.

2000 Bloggers -- Blogging Buzz

Tino had a great idea. What fun!

Click here to see:

Good News from the State of the Union Address -- The Arrival of Senator Jim Webb

The best news from this week's State of the Union Address was the response delivered by Democrats' newly elected Senator James Webb of Virginia. Compared to the careful, stilted response speeches in recent years, Senator Webb's response was a huge step forward, breathing new life into the image of Democratic leadership.

Confidence, honesty and levelheadedness came through his plain words, body language and tone. There was no hint of fear, nervousness or contrived manipulation.

Webb is a man on a mission, clearly intent on victory, a man you could feel confident following into battle.

His military past and continuing connection give him a perspective most members of Congress will never be able to achieve. His Vietnam war service, as a Marine awarded the Navy Cross, the Silver Star, two Bronze Stars and two Purple Hearts, speaks volumes about who he is.

It is not surprising he raised a son who is serving in Iraq. If you've never held a soldier's combat boots, you can't see things the same way as someone who has. This idea was emphasized by Webb's campaign symbol, his son's combat boots.



For the 70% of Americans who disapprove of Bush's handling of the war in Iraq (Newsweek Poll conducted by Princeton Survey Research Associates International. Jan. 17-18, 2007), this is the sort of perspective and leadership needed.

Stay tuned for more from James H. Webb. He undoubtedly has more to say.

Share the Love -- Like Screaming Teenagers at a Beatles Concert

Okay, well maybe not that fanatical, but all the same, here's our chance to acknowledge some great female bloggers. Heather at One Woman's World is hosting the Share the Love Blog Awards. I am nominating and will be voting for several of my favorite bloggers and encourage you to do the same. Just click here to go to the One Woman's World Share the Love Blog Awards page and learn how.

Weekend Inspiration

Feeling overwhelmed? Too much on your "To Do" list?

Cruise on over to Cooks on the Coast, a military mommy blog, and check out "Timeline of an international move" about their recent international move over the holidays . . .

After reading this, my laundry pile looks so much smaller.

Thank Goodness They Won't Know What She's Saying -- Part of the Thanks Giving Series

Thank goodness most people wouldn't be able to decipher what my 18-month-old, rosy-cheeked, blond-haired little cherub was saying today. Today, all day, she ran around my quaint suburban house saying repeatedly, "Oh Sh_t!"

Drop the spoon. "Oh Sh_t!" Toy fell down. "Oh Sh_t!" Looking for something. "Oh Sh_t!"

All day long.

It is her Daddy's favorite expletive. Coincidence? I think not.

Ah yes. We discussed this. Did he listen? Hmmmm.

This is certainly not a phrase my little rosebud learned from me. Here's the smoking gun: "Sh_t" is positively, absolutely my least favorite word in the English language, and perhaps in any other language in which it exists as well.

Recently someone commented on our "cute" Christmas card and asked, "And how did you ever get your husband to dress up like that?" Well, he was all for dressing up, but trust me I would so trade the picture of him in the giant mouse costume for not teaching our baby to say, "Oh Sh_t!"

For now, I'll just have to settle for the fact that her bad language is largely unintelligible, our saving grace.

Family Kicked Off Plane After Toddler's Tantrum

(The Wacky Wednesday post comes a day early this week. The following was just too good to pass up.)

From Yahoo! News
Toddler's temper ousts family from plane
By JIM ELLIS, Associated Press Writer
Tue Jan 23, 12:54 PM ET

ORLANDO, Fla. - AirTran Airways on Tuesday defended its decision to remove a Massachusetts couple from a flight after their crying 3-year-old daughter refused to take her seat before takeoff . . .

Toddler Files Tuesday -- Little Miss Dispose All

Last week the younger of my 18-month-old twins watched me cleaning the living room and decided to help. As I picked up things and threw them away, she found a crumb of food on the floor, picked it up, came to where I was and threw it into the trash can.

This astounded me and I praised her mightily. (I thought I would have to wait until they were pre-teens to have them help with the housework.)

Little did I realize the coming consequence of my actions. She is so pleased with her rubbish ridding skills that she has become Little Miss Dispose All. She buzzed around the trash can repeatedly today, and I had to keep waiving her off. Throwing stuff away came easily, but the mental discernment to make the distinction of what is to be thrown away and what isn't it is more difficult.

Today she picked up a flashcard with a picture of a truck and, before I could stop her, dumped it into the trash.

"No, no," I told her. "We don't throw away our toys."

She was unfazed.

"The toy is gone now. We threw it in the trash."

Yeah, who cares?

"Do you know what happens to things we throw in the trash? A big truck comes and picks them up and takes them away."

"Yeah," she said as if she understood every word.

"It takes them away, and they bury them."

"Yeah," she said again, like she already knew.

"And sometimes they burn them."

"Uh-Oh!"

For some reason this struck a chord. I will throw my toy away, and the trash truck can take it away, and men can bury it, but whatever you do, just don't let them burn it.

Who knows how the toddler mind works. It never ceases to surprise me.


*Broom illustration is a scan of one of the aforementioned flashcards -- Picture Words Pocket Flashcards, by TREND enterprises, Inc., www.trendenterprises.com.

Mombot Monday -- Quick Tip

Having two precious baby girls who spent a brief little stint in NICU, I quickly learned two things: 1) keeping baby's things clean is important, 2) time is always in short supply. I like to clean fabric books and dolls every week or two, but if I waited until I had time to wash them each by hand or "spot clean" as many of them recommend, they would be relegated to the Island of Lost Toys.

My solution? Mommy's little lingerie bag doubles as baby's toy washing bag. That great little zippered mesh bag that keeps delicate apparel safe on the gentle cycle so you don't have to hand wash (Yeah, right. Hand wash. Ha ha.) makes washing baby's fabric toys simple. Toss them in, zip up the bag and wash on gentle with a small load of delicates.

*A couple of disclaimers: Not every toy can withstand this treatment, so choose wisely, don't overcrowd the bag, use gentle detergent and no fabric softener, and be sure to examine toys closely for any tears before returning them to the play circuit.