Spring Break

Everybody needs one don't we? I'm giving myself a spring break. I'll be back in a week or two.

Flitting through the Blogosphere -- New Faves

Ah, the life of the bloginista, so much to read and so little time. How to decide? I will share with you a few of my recent finds.

You can be sure these are really, really enticing. How can you be sure? Because my friends, I have the attention span of an impatient fruit fly on crack. If a blog does not catch and hold my attention within the first half second, I'm off flitting through the blogosphere in search of the next tasty morsel upon which to feast my starving mind.

Mom 101 -- Funny, real and touching.

Lawyer Mama -- Never afraid to take on the tough topics, always writing with style.

Slacker-Moms-R-Us -- Funny, oh so funny, and the real deal.

Blog Con Queso -- A riot, an absolute laugh riot.

California Sunshine -- Special Feature for Thanks Giving Thursday

I had to make a little trip into L.A. today and thought I would bring a little of the joy home to share with you. A little sand and sun fix . . .

Thanks Giving Thursday

This week's Thanks Giving Thursday post will be a special feature posted late Thursday evening rather than in the wee hours of Thursday morning as usual. Please come back and visit for a little something special.

Wacky Wednesday -- It's a Tough Job

From Reuters.com

Parents beat up principal over grades
Mon Mar 5, 2007 3:00PM EST

BARI, Italy (Reuters) - An irate Italian family beat up a principal because they were unhappy with the grades a young relative had received and a ban on cell phones at school.

Wacky Wednesday -- And Now for Your Viewing Pleasure . . .

Monty Python and the Holy Grail in Lego

Toddler Files Tuesday -- Whatever It Is You Think You See Becomes a Pair of Shoes to Me

It seems like yesterday she pulled up and began walking. Then I bent over to put the dishes in the washer and turned around and found Baby K had put on her girlie pink moon boots all on her own.

Twenty months old and the girl loves shoes. Shoes. Shoes. Oh, the glories of shoes!

All pretty things were meant to be shoes. Baby K will and does put any pretty thing on her feet. It's like a Tootsie Roll commercial. Whatever it is you think you see becomes a pair of shoes to her. Green stacking ring? No silly! It's a sporty wedge. Empty Tupperware container? No my dear, it's a classic loafer. Colorful butterfly teething ring? Obviously, it's a strappy sandal. Even the coloring book? Clearly a casual flat.

But this time, she got it right. She put on her own shoes, all by herself. I can't help but feel we're embarking on a venturesome journey.

Potty Train -- What's In a Name

Lest you think I am a prude based on my previous post about "sh_t," I should share with you that I am a big fan of George Carlin's "Seven Words You Can Never Say On Television," a routine brought to mind by the whole potty training experience. Afterall, there are so many words associated with the potty that are just not acceptable in polite company. I mean, it's not good to be a "potty mouth."

I have read several blog entries recently about the importance of teaching our daughters the anatomically correct word "vagina," and I agree. When it comes to what to call our bums however, the path is less clear. Therefore, I am hard at work preparing a list of contenders for the title in our home. These are the current front-runners:

1) heinie -- my personal favorite
2) fanny -- fun choice, but also the name of a great aunt, which taints its appeal
3) hams -- interesting what you find in the thesaurus
4) rear -- more a location, don't you think?
5) rump -- cute, but also descriptive of a roast
6) bum -- cheeky, I like it
7) backside -- scary, makes me think of someone saying, "I'll tan yer backside."
8) posterior -- rather complicated
9) booty -- shake it! shake it!
10) groove-thing -- 70's flashback

Mombot Monday -- Special Recipe Flashback

Cranberries offer a refreshing tartness, good not just for winter, but also springtime dishes. This yummy and simple recipe for Cranberry Sauce makes a delicious treat over toasted English muffins.


We eat cranberries once or twice a year and every time I think, "We should do this more often." I was a little intimidated by them as a cook until last year when I made my first cranberry sauce. It's actually very simple. So I am sharing my own recipe for anyone who, like me, has ever been intimidated by cranberries.

Easy Cranberry Sauce Recipe

Ingredients:

-1 cup fresh cranberries, washed and drained
-1 medium green apple, cored and chopped into half-inch pieces
-1/3 medium orange chopped into half-inch pieces, leave rind on
-1 cup carbonated limeade beverage (12 ounces of 7Up or Sprite may be substituted)
-ground cinnamon to taste
-ground nutmeg to taste




Directions:

Place all ingredients in sauce pan over medium heat. Cook with lid on until sauce begins to simmer. Remove lid and simmer, stirring occasionally, until cranberries pop open. Remove from heat. Serve hot over toasted English muffins or your favorite breakfast pastry, or serve cold along with turkey or ham.

And They Call Him Senator

I have been repeatedly embarrassed by remarks made by Senator James Inhofe (R-Okla.) from my home state of Oklahoma. This is the man who continues to claim man-made global warming is "the greatest hoax ever perpetrated on the American people." Frankly, I thought he could no longer disappoint me. Then he came up with this:

from
Washingtonpost.com
But Did Ginger Rogers Wear Flip-Flops?

By Dana Milbank
Saturday, March 3, 2007; Page A02

Sen. Jim Inhofe (R-Okla.) got the crowd cheering early in the day. "I have been called -- my kids are all aware of this -- dumb, crazy man, science abuser, Holocaust denier, villain of the month, hate-filled, warmonger, Neanderthal, Genghis Khan and Attila the Hun," he announced. "And I can just tell you that I wear some of those titles proudly."

*Thanks to Daily Kos for picking this up. Visit Daily Kos directly to view the ensuing discussion in comments.

Thanks Giving Thursday -- On Being a Slacker Mommy

Easy is good. I like things easy, like Bisquick Complete. Just add water, shake it, and it makes pancakes. Well, you do have to actually pour them on a griddle and cook them, but still. If that's too much for you, you can buy frozen buttermilk pancakes and heat them in your microwave. Seriously! They sell these.

Peanut Butter and Jelly Sandwiches? You can buy them at the grocery store ready made. They even cut the crusts off. They're called Uncrustables.

Remember when you had to buy peanut butter and jelly in separate jars, open two jars, dip the knife in each and spread it on bread. Man, what a drag. Well, not anymore. Goober Grape to the rescue.

All winners in my book because they are time savers. And as we all know, time is not a renewable resource.

But the thing that really makes a slacker mommy's life complete is convenience cleaning products. I know, "slacker mommy" and "cleaning" might not seem to go together at first blush. But let's face it, if you have kids, you've got to clean. Heaven knows there's nothing a toddler enjoys more than trying to give you a heart attack by finding that one brown mystery glob you missed and leaning over to lick it off the floor.

Convenience cleaning products are the bomb, because after all, every minute I don't spend cleaning is another minute I can spend buffing my nails, eating ice cream bonbons and reading upscale fashion mags. Uhm, sorry slipped off into Never Never Gonna Happen Land momentarily. So, as I was saying, convenience cleaning products rock my world. And, drum roll please, I have found my favorite. The Lifetime Achievement Award for All Convenience Cleaning Products goes to Pampers Clean n Play Wipes.

They clean everything. AND they're even safe for cleaning things baby might (read inevitably will) put in her mouth. Great for highchairs. Cleans glass without streaking. Works like a charm on stove tops. Good for cleaning grime off of walls. Lovely on counter tops and chrome. If it can't be cleaned with a Pampers Clean n Play Wipe, it pretty much shouldn't be cleaned. Well, except for baby. They're not safe to use to clean the actual baby, but other than that, they're pretty much perfect.

(*I am not receiving any sort of reward for this gushy spiel about Pampers Clean n Play Wipes. I really just find them that exciting. Look out, soon I might be asking for a new washing machine for my anniversary.)

Wacky Wednesday -- Back to Mussel Beach

BBC News
Wales
Tuesday, 27 February 2007

Mussel's first class sea return
A shellfish has been returned to the sea off the coast of Anglesey after being posted "home" from Shropshire.

The mussel had been picked up by five-year-old Alastair Thornton from Church Stretton whilst on holiday.

His mother contacted an Anglesey website asking for advice to save it . . .

Toddler Files Tuesday -- The Incredible Floating Rump

The amazing butt-in-the-air sleeping position is well-documented by moms everywhere. You know the one, where baby's bottom is so precariously high it seems the child is destined to topple at any moment.

How do they do this? Now that I'm 37, I'm wondering how they even get the thing up that high without throwing their backs out, much less how they sleep that way.

The crazy thing is, it seems to be a comforting position. Had a big tantrum? Teething? Hoist your heinie in the air, fall asleep, and you'll feel much better.

Who knows how they do it. I'm quite sure I would fall out of my bed if I tried. (You can tell I've considered it.) At the very least, I would wake up unable to stand upright for several days.

Ah yes, to be a toddler again, to fall asleep with my fanny aloft, wear spaghetti sauce on my shirt with pride, and be endlessly amused by random things dropped on the floor.

Mombot Monday -- Keeping It Real, Not Ironing Sheets

My tip for the week? Let's be real. Despite the advice delivered on Oprah this past week, I do not iron my sheets twice a week. In fact, I doubt I will ever iron my sheets, because frankly, I would rather read a book, go for a walk, or volunteer at a homeless shelter. By comparison, ironing my sheets twice a week? Just seems like not such a high priority.

As parents, we constantly face the pressure of the clock. We are constantly prioritizing, then adapting and reprioritizing. There is always one more thing to be done that could make life better. Exercise more. Weed the flower beds. Cook meals from scratch. Grow a garden. Ironing sheets just doesn't appeal to me as adding that much to the greater good.

Maybe ironing sheets is your thing. Maybe it makes you totally happy. If so, more power to you, but if not, don't stress over it. In the grand scheme of things, tasks like ironing sheets and folding a fitted sheet into a perfect square don't have that much impact on life.

Here's my suggestion, each time you feel guilty about not ironing your sheets, or some other such thing, just think of the positive thing you did during the time you could have spent ironing sheets. For example, instead of ironing my sheets today, I walked to the park with my daughters.

I'll choose the walk to the park every time.

Potty Train -- Peezza

It's funny how toddler skills transfer from one area to another. It appears this week we have been blessed by the ability to say the word "pee." Anything that sounds like pee is now known as pee. For example, when we ordered pizza this week, the girls delighted at the arrival of the "pee." No matter that I called it "Pizza." Clearly, it was "pee."

"Pee! Pee!" they exclaimed as I carried two deliciously warm pizza boxes into the kitchen.

"Pee, Pee, Pee," as they went into the highchairs. Someone who didn't know them would have assumed I was making a huge mistake by placing them in their highchairs at that exact moment.

"Pee!" as I cut up the pizza.

And "pee," they sighed as I placed it on their trays.

Maybe we'll go out to eat at a peezza buffet soon, or maybe we'll just drop by for entertainment.

Mombot Monday -- Follow Up

As a follow up to last week's Mombot Monday article about online learning, the animated header above (imperfect as it is) is one I designed by learning from these helpful folks:

Jon Armstrong -- http://www.blurbomat.com/archives/2006/10/31/ (Photoshop tips from Dooce's husband)

Helpful Bloggers -- http://groups.google.com/group/blogger-help/search?q=header+photobucket&start=10&sa=N& (Blogger Help Group messages re implementing new headers)

Russell Brown -- http://www.russellbrown.com/ (Photoshop tips from an Adobe guru)

Janee -- http://www.myjanee.com/tuts/animation/animation.htm (Easy animation instructions)

If you would like more information, just leave me a comment and will be happy to post a more detailed explanation of the steps I followed.

Political Pop

Half a week was spent discussing the inconsequential details of a minor dispute between the Obama and Clinton campaigns. Sadly some major news broadcasters do as much news creating as they do news reporting, repeating the same story ten times or more in one day. It's like journalistic brainwashing.

Should what one Barack Obama supporter said about Hillary Clinton really be headline news? Does it impact the issues? Does it impact who either candidate is or their positions on issues? No. Period.

In this situation, however, the supporter was a wealthy Hollywood power player. CNN, in particular, jumped at the opportunity to add some glitz and drama to the challengingly dry political arena by focusing on something other than the issues. It's like watching reporting perfectly attuned to the interests of 12-year-old gossiping girls.

If I recall correctly, another one of their top stories recently was that Donatella Versace said Hillary Clinton should wear skirts instead of pants. People, leave it alone. If there's no political news to report that you feel the American public would be interested in, then don't report any, but for Heaven's sake, don't just make some up. Donatella Versace said Hillary Clinton shouldn't wear pants? That's not news. Let me help you with the distinction. If Prime Minister Blair said President Bush shouldn't wear pants, that would be news.

What will be next in political news? This week's journalistic feeding frenzy will occur in Hollywood, centered around the Oscars. So we might expect some political news to come from there as well.

The audience viewing the Oscars is larger, I'm guessing, and vastly more tuned-in than the audience for political campaigns. It's only logical to believe messages delivered there have potential to have more impact than those delivered via traditional modes of political communication. So, don't be surprised if your favorite actor delivers his or her own political message along with an acceptance speech, as has happened in the past, because the fact is we remain insatiable consumers of political pop.

Perfume

The right scent wafts me away. Perfume is my innocent escape. It's one of the things that defines me as me and not just mom-me.

When I was pregnant, nothing smelled good. Except maybe pickles. On nachos. From 7-Eleven. But now, welcome home, fragrance my friend.

Scents that are earthy and warm appeal to me most, scents like musk and sandalwood, scents that say, "I'm crunchy, but sexy, in an I-shave-my-underarm-hair kind of way."

Gourmand scents can be lovely too, with notes of cinnamon or vanilla. If I wasn't afraid of smelling like a freshly baked pie, I just might sprinkle a little nutmeg behind my ears and go.

The right florals can be nice, although I'm much more picky about those. I don't want to smell like I've been doused in Grandmother's rose water, but I do love the intoxicating scent of Jasmine.

What makes my blood rush though is the ultimate, the complex ambery scent that brings it all to a climax in one enveloping aromatherapy party, the one crafted by an expert perfumer and rare enough that once a man associates it with you, he will think only of you whenever he smells it. That my friends is perfume. Va-va-va-voom.

Wacky Wednesday -- Bogged Down by Beanie Babies

From The Muskegon Chronicle
Not so warm and fuzzy: Burglar nabs 145 Beanie Babies
Monday, February 19, 2007

By Lisa Medendorp
lmedendorp@muskegonchronicle.com

The getaway car -- loaded with 145 purloined Beanie Babies -- got stuck in the snow early Saturday in Norton Shores.

Not willing to lose his loot, the alleged Beanie Baby burglar got a pickup truck from a friend's home, drove back to the intersection of Worden Street and Sunbury Avenue and tossed the stuffed critters into the truck bed.

What the 37-year-old suspect didn't know was that Norton Shores police were already on the way . . .

from The Toddler Files

You can create your own card at Blyberg.net. Thanks to Jerusalem at My Little Life for the great find.