Even Their Dog Was Staring

The girls and I picked up these lovely new toys today at World Market. So shiny and pretty and impliedly smart too, because I mean look at it, it has a globe inside. Oh, and it spins too, like a real spinning globe. And it's surrounded by little flashing lights. It's spectacular. The best toy ever. Why? Because it has hypnotic powers. I don't know what it's called, but it should be called the Incredible Toddler Hypno-Ray. Works like a dream.

And we got two of them. Yay!

Naturally, when the girls became cranky just before bath time, the obvious solution was for me to do a little Incredible Toddler Hypno-Ray dance. Of course they work best in the dark, so I turned out the lights in the room and pretended to direct a plane coming in for landing. Then dancing with crazy, flashing maracas. Next flaming torches in a native island dance. Soon I was a one woman light show for the Rolling Stones.





It was about that time I looked over and realized the curtains were open and a family of three was stopped in their tracks on the walking path behind our home. Even their dog was staring. Apparently too troubled to move until they had satisfied themselves I wasn't experiencing some sort of sequence of uncontrollable body spasms, they stood there expressionless, unwilling witnesses to my artistic interpretive dance.

When I confessed to my husband this evening, he suggested perhaps they were wondering if the show would be at the same time tomorrow night.

It's My Potty, I'll Sing If I Want To

People frequently ask how I manage with twins. Sometimes it's challenging. Sometimes it makes things easier. Today it was both.

Not long ago, I mentioned that we recently began potty training. Today was a banner day, three pee-pees in the potty and one almost poop.

The best part though was the girls' antics.

"Okay, let's go potty," brought instant smiles and a race to the bathroom door.

While Baby K sat on the potty "meditating," Baby Z would dance and sing the potty song for her. I have no idea what inspired her, but her sister loved it, and it seemed to work.

"Pee pee pee pee pee pee pee pee," she sang, smiling and spinning like a whirling dervish. And then her sister peed. And we all cheered and clapped.

Baby K was so pleased with the whole experience she wanted to give the toilet a big hug. When it flushed, she kept trying to lay her head on the lid and wrap her arms around the commode as the water swished beneath. Maybe it looked just a bit too much like a big kitty with that fuzzy toilet lid cover.

Wacky Wednesday -- Wow, He's Buff! Wait I Mean, In the Buff.

From USA TODAY, Dutch gym to introduce 'Naked Sunday' for naturists -- "AMSTERDAM (AP) — Self-conscious about what you wear while working out? A Dutch gym plans to introduce "Naked Sunday" for people who like to huff and puff in the buff."

For me, signing up for "Naked Sunday" would be enough inspiration in and of itself to get fit. It's bad enough that someone might have to see my extra-wide mommy fanny in Yoga class, but my naked extra-wide mommy fanny, now that would be really bad.

Potty Train -- I Found the Wrong Video. Did You Find the Right One?

I would like the same people who create Disney Channel's marketing to come to my house and potty train my children. I think they could get them to do anything. It's a little frightening really.

They don't have a mind control Disney video for potty training that I have been able to find, so Saturday, I bought Elmo's Potty Time. How could you go wrong with Sesame Street and Elmo? With the help of Sesame Street's Guess that Shape and Color, I have been teaching the girls shapes and colors already. Unfortunately, I didn't find the Elmo's Potty Time video nearly as helpful.

It was long on explanation and short on illustration. Perhaps it would be suitable for children quite a bit older with more language skills and longer attention spans. Our girls are expressing an interest in using the potty now, so this is not the video for them.

If you've found a potty training video you can recommend, I would love to hear about it.

Mombot Monday -- They Can Sense Weakness, You Know

It's true. Little children can sense weakness and smell fear too. Should you experience injury of any kind, do not show weakness. I repeat do not show weakness.

Upon returning home from my doctor's appointment with this lovely new accoutrement upon my foot, my darling baby girl with curly hair and big brown eyes and long eyelashes, took one look at me and knew I was easy prey.

She decided to test me by going for the cabinet door. When I told her "No, come here," she stared me in the eye, looked down at my injured foot, and then back up at me and told me "No."

When I took a step toward her, she prepared to run. She reminded me of a lioness stalking an injured gazelle. She knew instinctively that I was at a disadvantage.

She began to run.

And here is where I made my mistake. I showed weakness . . . and fear. I hobbled around my kitchen like a 1970's Weeble. I wobbled round and round, afraid I would fall down.

We circled the kitchen island at least twice before I realized this was going nowhere. I would have to pick up the pace. Once I caught her, she realized Mommy was still functional and the issue was resolved.

The Incredible Molly Ivins

When I heard the news on Thursday that Molly Ivins had died, I thought of the many great laughs and insights she had given us and mourned that there will never be another exactly like her.

Few are be able to wield the pen as she did, as both sword and feather, slicing to the heart of truth with a humorist's touch. The dance of politics and humor she choreographed, like a combination of ballet and stomp, was intelligent, artful and straight to the point.

No one could say it better than Ms. Ivins; therefore, I leave you with NPR's tribute, Treasuring the Wit and Wisdom of Molly Ivins, by Wade Goodwyn. It is ripe with interviews with and audio snippets of Ms. Ivins. Just Click Here.

The Polls Are Open

You can vote here for your favorite female bloggers in the Share the Love Awards.

My favorites, including my nominees, can be found in the Good Reading list to the right. I am sure they would love it if you would visit their blogs and have a look around. I am always interested in hearing about new blogs, so I would love to hear about your favorites too.

Football Bride, Not a Football Widow

Hubby and I met seven years ago seated around a television watching New Year's Day football games. His very smart sister invited me (recently un-engaged), four single guys, and her boyfriend to her place for a football bash with the intent of setting me up with someone. Apparently, I was very hot or they were very desperate, probably more of the latter, because I walked away with several options for dates and very, very flattered. It gave me the confidence to choose the hottest, smartest and most successful guy there, even though he was six years my junior. Two years later we were married. (And yes, we even tried to watch football on our honeymoon. Unfortunately television schedules in Dublin didn't cooperate.)

For ever after we will be football fans, and every time we watch a game it brings back memories of the way we met. Therefore, we must, nay are required to by the laws of heaven and nature, watch the Super Bowl.

Arguably the best part of the game is the Super Ads which you can enjoy on your own or with your football viewing partner by clicking here to view today's Super Bowl Ads.

Thanks Giving Thursday: Potty Train, All Aboard!

It's a Potty Train! (Hum Soul Train theme music here. If not old enough to remember, just substitute theme from Thomas the Tank Engine. It'll be fine.)

Thanks Ladies for the comments regarding yesterday's post. When it comes to potty training, I have been feeling a bit like I have been sucked into the swirling vortex of the toilet flush. Just then you came along and offered your hand. (Lovely imagery, eh?)

You have paid me one of the best compliments I can imagine by implying I might have a spec of something insightful to offer on this subject. So, today I am thankful for the camaraderie of my fellow potty training blogging mamas. Muchas gracias.

Here is my little smidge of insight. Let's all do this thing together. I would love to hear your insight too. The best advice I get on all things baby almost always comes from conversation with other mommy ladies.

I promise to post on the Potty Train on Mondays, and I hope you will come along for the adventure. Your two cents in advice is your ticket to ride.

All aboard! Please keep hands, feet and flailing toddlers inside the compartment at all times. It may be a bumpy ride.

*The idea is that the Monday Potty Train review will be a bit like the Weight Watchers weigh-in, where I lost, where I gained and where I flubbed and totally need your advice.

Wacky Wednesday -- Diaper Double Duty

We have just begun potty training at the House of ZoKai and already I am dreaming of what to do with the disposable diapers soon to be left high and dry.

Although I pride myself on the fact that I fashion a fine looking diaper hat, a girl can only wear so many hats. So what do with the rest? What to do? What to do?

I did a little research and found the following suggestions:

Microwaveable heating pad (Not so sure I would toss a diaper in my microwave, but OK.), keeping a plant watered longer by putting a diaper in the bottom of the pot, and packing material for shipment of fine china (Somehow that just seems wrong.) all from Extraordinary Uses for Ordinary Things from Reader's Digest RD.com.

You can even make a "diaper cake" for a baby shower as seen here.

Who knew?

Toddler Files Tuesday -- Chicken Grease Hair Grease and Other Beauty Secrets

My 18-month-old twin girls have a flare for beauty, especially at the dinner table. Their innovation and style are awe-inspiring.

Before them, I never knew:

Chicken grease makes a lovely hair pomade (hair grease).

A partially chewed chicken stick makes a lovely hair barrette.

Applesauce is intended to be worn on your eyebrows.

Bowls and spoons are simply tools of application.

Cheese is to be worn upon your head.

~and~

Strawberry-banana cereal bars make a lovely shade of lip color.


Who needs MAC when you have babies like these?

Achieving Nirvana

I have achieved nirvana. I weigh less than Tyra Banks.

I mean seriously, who could say she is fat? Look at her!

Hooray for Tyra Banks for standing up to the silly people who called her fat. Wouldn't we all like to be fat like that?

A review for you, or is it for me? Well, anyway . . .

Recently, one of my favorite bloggers and role models wrote a great book review. It got me thinking, maybe I should do a review. Then I went to the grocery store, and one thing led to another, and here we are.

I will review CHOCOLATE, Emily's Chocolate Covered Fortune Cookies. This is an entirely self-serving review I have burdened myself with simply because writing a review is as good an excuse as any to try new chocolate. (This is not an ad, nor will I receive any sort of compensation, other than rewarding myself with copious amounts of chocolate.)

The shiny, red Chinese take-out box caught my eye from the Valentine's Day display at the grocery store. (Shiny and red. Oh boy.)

So how are they? The sweet chocolate coating is complimented nicely by the crunchy and delicately sweet fortune cookie beneath. It is a nice change of pace from the average boring boxed chocolate you see every year.

The love message fortunes inside the cookies are a nice touch too, although not exquisitely inspiring.



The one criticism I have is that the chocolate is not the highest quality. It's clearly built to have a long shelf-life. Still, I must admit I was amused by the warning on the bottom of the box: Temperature Sensitive Chocolate. (Ah yes, as opposed to the non-temperature-sensitive chocolate that wouldn't melt if you held it directly over an open flame.)

All in all, the packaging and originality make for a cute gift for a special someone, even more so if combined with Chinese take-out and a good bottle of wine.

Mombot Monday -- When Specials Are Not Special

It's on special!

The special at a local grocery store this week was to sell my favorite brand of laundry detergent for 2 for $9 rather than 1 for $3.99.



Mombot tip of the week: Beware of the special. Just because the flyer says it is special does not mean it is. For example, I fell for this ad because it said 63 oz. to 100 oz. sizes were on special for 2 for $9. I assumed that must mean that the 100 oz. was on special for 2 for $9 because I knew the smaller size was regularly priced at $3.99. Oh yes, we all know what happens when we assume. So, I wasted my time.

Another time saver bonus tip, I try to make a mental note of which stores use this type of advertising frequently and avoid them all together. Although I noticed today, there are times when I might not.

2000 Bloggers -- Blogging Buzz

Tino had a great idea. What fun!

Click here to see:

Good News from the State of the Union Address -- The Arrival of Senator Jim Webb

The best news from this week's State of the Union Address was the response delivered by Democrats' newly elected Senator James Webb of Virginia. Compared to the careful, stilted response speeches in recent years, Senator Webb's response was a huge step forward, breathing new life into the image of Democratic leadership.

Confidence, honesty and levelheadedness came through his plain words, body language and tone. There was no hint of fear, nervousness or contrived manipulation.

Webb is a man on a mission, clearly intent on victory, a man you could feel confident following into battle.

His military past and continuing connection give him a perspective most members of Congress will never be able to achieve. His Vietnam war service, as a Marine awarded the Navy Cross, the Silver Star, two Bronze Stars and two Purple Hearts, speaks volumes about who he is.

It is not surprising he raised a son who is serving in Iraq. If you've never held a soldier's combat boots, you can't see things the same way as someone who has. This idea was emphasized by Webb's campaign symbol, his son's combat boots.



For the 70% of Americans who disapprove of Bush's handling of the war in Iraq (Newsweek Poll conducted by Princeton Survey Research Associates International. Jan. 17-18, 2007), this is the sort of perspective and leadership needed.

Stay tuned for more from James H. Webb. He undoubtedly has more to say.

Share the Love -- Like Screaming Teenagers at a Beatles Concert

Okay, well maybe not that fanatical, but all the same, here's our chance to acknowledge some great female bloggers. Heather at One Woman's World is hosting the Share the Love Blog Awards. I am nominating and will be voting for several of my favorite bloggers and encourage you to do the same. Just click here to go to the One Woman's World Share the Love Blog Awards page and learn how.

Weekend Inspiration

Feeling overwhelmed? Too much on your "To Do" list?

Cruise on over to Cooks on the Coast, a military mommy blog, and check out "Timeline of an international move" about their recent international move over the holidays . . .

After reading this, my laundry pile looks so much smaller.

Thank Goodness They Won't Know What She's Saying -- Part of the Thanks Giving Series

Thank goodness most people wouldn't be able to decipher what my 18-month-old, rosy-cheeked, blond-haired little cherub was saying today. Today, all day, she ran around my quaint suburban house saying repeatedly, "Oh Sh_t!"

Drop the spoon. "Oh Sh_t!" Toy fell down. "Oh Sh_t!" Looking for something. "Oh Sh_t!"

All day long.

It is her Daddy's favorite expletive. Coincidence? I think not.

Ah yes. We discussed this. Did he listen? Hmmmm.

This is certainly not a phrase my little rosebud learned from me. Here's the smoking gun: "Sh_t" is positively, absolutely my least favorite word in the English language, and perhaps in any other language in which it exists as well.

Recently someone commented on our "cute" Christmas card and asked, "And how did you ever get your husband to dress up like that?" Well, he was all for dressing up, but trust me I would so trade the picture of him in the giant mouse costume for not teaching our baby to say, "Oh Sh_t!"

For now, I'll just have to settle for the fact that her bad language is largely unintelligible, our saving grace.

Family Kicked Off Plane After Toddler's Tantrum

(The Wacky Wednesday post comes a day early this week. The following was just too good to pass up.)

From Yahoo! News
Toddler's temper ousts family from plane
By JIM ELLIS, Associated Press Writer
Tue Jan 23, 12:54 PM ET

ORLANDO, Fla. - AirTran Airways on Tuesday defended its decision to remove a Massachusetts couple from a flight after their crying 3-year-old daughter refused to take her seat before takeoff . . .