Happy Valentine's Day

Valentine Animation by Jlaruby

Wacky Wednesday -- In my day it would have been hairspray . . .

In my day it would have been hairspray (think 80's and big hair bands) . . .

Teens turn out to be underarmed and dangerous...
Mon Feb 12, 2007 3:57PM EST
From Reuters.com

BERLIN (Reuters) - A group of young German women used so much spray deodorant in the bathroom of a North Sea youth hostel that it set off a fire alarm and brought the local fire brigade rushing to the rescue . . .

Toddler Files Tuesday

This week the Toddler Files Tuesday post will appear Tuesday evening rather than Tuesday morning.

The Mother Lode -- Thanks Cool Mom Picks

Cool Mom Picks sent me this great gob of goodies just for posting their Holiday Gift Guide button, the button I posted simply because they have truly great finds. I had no idea I could win prizes too. Bonus!

My fave from the whole bunch, the Skip*Hop Saddlebag in pink camo:



From the Skip*Hop website:

n. sad·dle·bag
1. One of a pair of pouches hanging across the back of a horse behind the saddle.
2. A pouch hanging from a saddle or over the rear wheel of a motorcycle or bicycle.
3. A stylin’ pouch from Skip Hop that attaches to the sides of nearly any stroller.

Check the cool karate pants from Beasty Baby. If only the "Cranky" pants came in my size . . .




I love this adorable lavender tee from Emotional Armor. Guess what. These come in mommy size.



From Mommytrackd, came these nifty eat sheets -- menu planner and grocery list all in one. Where have these been all my life?



Tired of picking up sippy cups off the sidewalk? Boy, am I. I can't wait to try this one. Drop Stop, from Atea Kids, is designed to prevent baby paraphernalia such sippy cups and teething rings from making their way to the ground.



Last, not least, this lovely lavender scented Head-to-Toe Baby Wash from Bug & Pickle, is a treat for the whole family. The scent is soft enough for baby, masculine enough for dad and fresh enough for mom.



Thanks Cool Mom Picks!

Potty Train -- A Step in the Right Direction

"Hhhmmm. Pee-pee. Uh-oh."

Progress! Baby K uttered the words above as we drove to the bookstore today for a family outing. I never thought I would be so happy to hear my child tell me she wet herself, but it really seems like progress. While we still are not making many pees and poos in the potty, the girls are becoming more aware of what is going on with their bodies. I hope that is a big step in the right direction.

Mombot Monday -- No Thanks to $9 Dish Soap

I love Restoration Hardware. Their products are classically designed, and comparatively speaking, not terribly expensive.

When I received their Early Spring 2007 catalog recently, I enjoyed a quick fantasy run through it. Although I found lots to love, I just couldn't help but find the humor in the $42 soap and lotion "3-Piece Caddy" seen here:



A bit pricey for three plastic bottles of dish soap, hand soap and lotion, don't you think? While I don't mind paying Restoration Hardware prices for the quality they offer in more significant items such as sofas or bed linens, I just can't see paying $16 for Restoration Hardware Dryer Sheets or $9 for Restoration Hardware scented dish soap. I mean, do I really need my dishes to be scented? No, I think not.



But I do love the look of the simple little soap and lotion caddy pictured above. Here's my solution and tip of the week. Peruse the catalogs of the places you love and learn which less expensive stores imitate their style. You can invest in quality for significant items like artwork and furniture and save a little on things that are less noticeable, such as dish soap and dryer sheets.

I found a similar soap and lotion caddy at World Market for $15. Granted it has a slightly different look, but for a price difference of nearly $30, that's a sacrifice I'm willing to make.



World Market and Pier 1 Imports often carry goods very similar to current offerings of Restoration Hardware. Their prices are lower, and you can find some great deals on sale.

Live, Learn, Listen -- The State of Black and White America

"I have a dream" still rings in the ears of those who believe in an integrated society. Brown v. Board of Education of Topeka revealed the concept of separate, but equal schools as a farce and made it legally unacceptable. In most places, however, the reality is we still have separate schools, only under a different guise, and they are not equal.

We have separate churches and separate neighborhoods -- separate lives. Black and white America live in separate realities, a fact that makes genuine understanding a true challenge on either side.

With that in mind, regardless of your race, I would like to direct your attention to The State of Black America hosted by Tavis Smiley which aired this week on C-SPAN. Participants include: Douglas Wilder, former Governor of Virginia; Cathy Hughes, Radio One Founder and President; The Reverend Jesse Jackson; The Reverend Al Sharpton; Sonia Sanchez, poet; and others.

In law school, I was privileged to take a course called Race, Racism and the Law, taught by Professor Anita Hill. Perhaps the most important lesson I learned was that people's positions are not always what you anticipate. If you read about something, you can learn to think about it, but if you live something, you truly learn it. If you can't live it, you can at least listen to someone who has lived it.

To view The State of Black America hosted by Tavis Smiley as aired on C-SPAN, just click here or click here to go to the C-SPAN.org page featuring their recent video archives, scroll down and click on the program title.

Even Their Dog Was Staring

The girls and I picked up these lovely new toys today at World Market. So shiny and pretty and impliedly smart too, because I mean look at it, it has a globe inside. Oh, and it spins too, like a real spinning globe. And it's surrounded by little flashing lights. It's spectacular. The best toy ever. Why? Because it has hypnotic powers. I don't know what it's called, but it should be called the Incredible Toddler Hypno-Ray. Works like a dream.

And we got two of them. Yay!

Naturally, when the girls became cranky just before bath time, the obvious solution was for me to do a little Incredible Toddler Hypno-Ray dance. Of course they work best in the dark, so I turned out the lights in the room and pretended to direct a plane coming in for landing. Then dancing with crazy, flashing maracas. Next flaming torches in a native island dance. Soon I was a one woman light show for the Rolling Stones.





It was about that time I looked over and realized the curtains were open and a family of three was stopped in their tracks on the walking path behind our home. Even their dog was staring. Apparently too troubled to move until they had satisfied themselves I wasn't experiencing some sort of sequence of uncontrollable body spasms, they stood there expressionless, unwilling witnesses to my artistic interpretive dance.

When I confessed to my husband this evening, he suggested perhaps they were wondering if the show would be at the same time tomorrow night.

It's My Potty, I'll Sing If I Want To

People frequently ask how I manage with twins. Sometimes it's challenging. Sometimes it makes things easier. Today it was both.

Not long ago, I mentioned that we recently began potty training. Today was a banner day, three pee-pees in the potty and one almost poop.

The best part though was the girls' antics.

"Okay, let's go potty," brought instant smiles and a race to the bathroom door.

While Baby K sat on the potty "meditating," Baby Z would dance and sing the potty song for her. I have no idea what inspired her, but her sister loved it, and it seemed to work.

"Pee pee pee pee pee pee pee pee," she sang, smiling and spinning like a whirling dervish. And then her sister peed. And we all cheered and clapped.

Baby K was so pleased with the whole experience she wanted to give the toilet a big hug. When it flushed, she kept trying to lay her head on the lid and wrap her arms around the commode as the water swished beneath. Maybe it looked just a bit too much like a big kitty with that fuzzy toilet lid cover.

Wacky Wednesday -- Wow, He's Buff! Wait I Mean, In the Buff.

From USA TODAY, Dutch gym to introduce 'Naked Sunday' for naturists -- "AMSTERDAM (AP) — Self-conscious about what you wear while working out? A Dutch gym plans to introduce "Naked Sunday" for people who like to huff and puff in the buff."

For me, signing up for "Naked Sunday" would be enough inspiration in and of itself to get fit. It's bad enough that someone might have to see my extra-wide mommy fanny in Yoga class, but my naked extra-wide mommy fanny, now that would be really bad.

Potty Train -- I Found the Wrong Video. Did You Find the Right One?

I would like the same people who create Disney Channel's marketing to come to my house and potty train my children. I think they could get them to do anything. It's a little frightening really.

They don't have a mind control Disney video for potty training that I have been able to find, so Saturday, I bought Elmo's Potty Time. How could you go wrong with Sesame Street and Elmo? With the help of Sesame Street's Guess that Shape and Color, I have been teaching the girls shapes and colors already. Unfortunately, I didn't find the Elmo's Potty Time video nearly as helpful.

It was long on explanation and short on illustration. Perhaps it would be suitable for children quite a bit older with more language skills and longer attention spans. Our girls are expressing an interest in using the potty now, so this is not the video for them.

If you've found a potty training video you can recommend, I would love to hear about it.

Mombot Monday -- They Can Sense Weakness, You Know

It's true. Little children can sense weakness and smell fear too. Should you experience injury of any kind, do not show weakness. I repeat do not show weakness.

Upon returning home from my doctor's appointment with this lovely new accoutrement upon my foot, my darling baby girl with curly hair and big brown eyes and long eyelashes, took one look at me and knew I was easy prey.

She decided to test me by going for the cabinet door. When I told her "No, come here," she stared me in the eye, looked down at my injured foot, and then back up at me and told me "No."

When I took a step toward her, she prepared to run. She reminded me of a lioness stalking an injured gazelle. She knew instinctively that I was at a disadvantage.

She began to run.

And here is where I made my mistake. I showed weakness . . . and fear. I hobbled around my kitchen like a 1970's Weeble. I wobbled round and round, afraid I would fall down.

We circled the kitchen island at least twice before I realized this was going nowhere. I would have to pick up the pace. Once I caught her, she realized Mommy was still functional and the issue was resolved.

The Incredible Molly Ivins

When I heard the news on Thursday that Molly Ivins had died, I thought of the many great laughs and insights she had given us and mourned that there will never be another exactly like her.

Few are be able to wield the pen as she did, as both sword and feather, slicing to the heart of truth with a humorist's touch. The dance of politics and humor she choreographed, like a combination of ballet and stomp, was intelligent, artful and straight to the point.

No one could say it better than Ms. Ivins; therefore, I leave you with NPR's tribute, Treasuring the Wit and Wisdom of Molly Ivins, by Wade Goodwyn. It is ripe with interviews with and audio snippets of Ms. Ivins. Just Click Here.

The Polls Are Open

You can vote here for your favorite female bloggers in the Share the Love Awards.

My favorites, including my nominees, can be found in the Good Reading list to the right. I am sure they would love it if you would visit their blogs and have a look around. I am always interested in hearing about new blogs, so I would love to hear about your favorites too.

Football Bride, Not a Football Widow

Hubby and I met seven years ago seated around a television watching New Year's Day football games. His very smart sister invited me (recently un-engaged), four single guys, and her boyfriend to her place for a football bash with the intent of setting me up with someone. Apparently, I was very hot or they were very desperate, probably more of the latter, because I walked away with several options for dates and very, very flattered. It gave me the confidence to choose the hottest, smartest and most successful guy there, even though he was six years my junior. Two years later we were married. (And yes, we even tried to watch football on our honeymoon. Unfortunately television schedules in Dublin didn't cooperate.)

For ever after we will be football fans, and every time we watch a game it brings back memories of the way we met. Therefore, we must, nay are required to by the laws of heaven and nature, watch the Super Bowl.

Arguably the best part of the game is the Super Ads which you can enjoy on your own or with your football viewing partner by clicking here to view today's Super Bowl Ads.

Thanks Giving Thursday: Potty Train, All Aboard!

It's a Potty Train! (Hum Soul Train theme music here. If not old enough to remember, just substitute theme from Thomas the Tank Engine. It'll be fine.)

Thanks Ladies for the comments regarding yesterday's post. When it comes to potty training, I have been feeling a bit like I have been sucked into the swirling vortex of the toilet flush. Just then you came along and offered your hand. (Lovely imagery, eh?)

You have paid me one of the best compliments I can imagine by implying I might have a spec of something insightful to offer on this subject. So, today I am thankful for the camaraderie of my fellow potty training blogging mamas. Muchas gracias.

Here is my little smidge of insight. Let's all do this thing together. I would love to hear your insight too. The best advice I get on all things baby almost always comes from conversation with other mommy ladies.

I promise to post on the Potty Train on Mondays, and I hope you will come along for the adventure. Your two cents in advice is your ticket to ride.

All aboard! Please keep hands, feet and flailing toddlers inside the compartment at all times. It may be a bumpy ride.

*The idea is that the Monday Potty Train review will be a bit like the Weight Watchers weigh-in, where I lost, where I gained and where I flubbed and totally need your advice.

Wacky Wednesday -- Diaper Double Duty

We have just begun potty training at the House of ZoKai and already I am dreaming of what to do with the disposable diapers soon to be left high and dry.

Although I pride myself on the fact that I fashion a fine looking diaper hat, a girl can only wear so many hats. So what do with the rest? What to do? What to do?

I did a little research and found the following suggestions:

Microwaveable heating pad (Not so sure I would toss a diaper in my microwave, but OK.), keeping a plant watered longer by putting a diaper in the bottom of the pot, and packing material for shipment of fine china (Somehow that just seems wrong.) all from Extraordinary Uses for Ordinary Things from Reader's Digest RD.com.

You can even make a "diaper cake" for a baby shower as seen here.

Who knew?

Toddler Files Tuesday -- Chicken Grease Hair Grease and Other Beauty Secrets

My 18-month-old twin girls have a flare for beauty, especially at the dinner table. Their innovation and style are awe-inspiring.

Before them, I never knew:

Chicken grease makes a lovely hair pomade (hair grease).

A partially chewed chicken stick makes a lovely hair barrette.

Applesauce is intended to be worn on your eyebrows.

Bowls and spoons are simply tools of application.

Cheese is to be worn upon your head.

~and~

Strawberry-banana cereal bars make a lovely shade of lip color.


Who needs MAC when you have babies like these?

Achieving Nirvana

I have achieved nirvana. I weigh less than Tyra Banks.

I mean seriously, who could say she is fat? Look at her!

Hooray for Tyra Banks for standing up to the silly people who called her fat. Wouldn't we all like to be fat like that?

A review for you, or is it for me? Well, anyway . . .

Recently, one of my favorite bloggers and role models wrote a great book review. It got me thinking, maybe I should do a review. Then I went to the grocery store, and one thing led to another, and here we are.

I will review CHOCOLATE, Emily's Chocolate Covered Fortune Cookies. This is an entirely self-serving review I have burdened myself with simply because writing a review is as good an excuse as any to try new chocolate. (This is not an ad, nor will I receive any sort of compensation, other than rewarding myself with copious amounts of chocolate.)

The shiny, red Chinese take-out box caught my eye from the Valentine's Day display at the grocery store. (Shiny and red. Oh boy.)

So how are they? The sweet chocolate coating is complimented nicely by the crunchy and delicately sweet fortune cookie beneath. It is a nice change of pace from the average boring boxed chocolate you see every year.

The love message fortunes inside the cookies are a nice touch too, although not exquisitely inspiring.



The one criticism I have is that the chocolate is not the highest quality. It's clearly built to have a long shelf-life. Still, I must admit I was amused by the warning on the bottom of the box: Temperature Sensitive Chocolate. (Ah yes, as opposed to the non-temperature-sensitive chocolate that wouldn't melt if you held it directly over an open flame.)

All in all, the packaging and originality make for a cute gift for a special someone, even more so if combined with Chinese take-out and a good bottle of wine.

Mombot Monday -- When Specials Are Not Special

It's on special!

The special at a local grocery store this week was to sell my favorite brand of laundry detergent for 2 for $9 rather than 1 for $3.99.



Mombot tip of the week: Beware of the special. Just because the flyer says it is special does not mean it is. For example, I fell for this ad because it said 63 oz. to 100 oz. sizes were on special for 2 for $9. I assumed that must mean that the 100 oz. was on special for 2 for $9 because I knew the smaller size was regularly priced at $3.99. Oh yes, we all know what happens when we assume. So, I wasted my time.

Another time saver bonus tip, I try to make a mental note of which stores use this type of advertising frequently and avoid them all together. Although I noticed today, there are times when I might not.

2000 Bloggers -- Blogging Buzz

Tino had a great idea. What fun!

Click here to see:

Good News from the State of the Union Address -- The Arrival of Senator Jim Webb

The best news from this week's State of the Union Address was the response delivered by Democrats' newly elected Senator James Webb of Virginia. Compared to the careful, stilted response speeches in recent years, Senator Webb's response was a huge step forward, breathing new life into the image of Democratic leadership.

Confidence, honesty and levelheadedness came through his plain words, body language and tone. There was no hint of fear, nervousness or contrived manipulation.

Webb is a man on a mission, clearly intent on victory, a man you could feel confident following into battle.

His military past and continuing connection give him a perspective most members of Congress will never be able to achieve. His Vietnam war service, as a Marine awarded the Navy Cross, the Silver Star, two Bronze Stars and two Purple Hearts, speaks volumes about who he is.

It is not surprising he raised a son who is serving in Iraq. If you've never held a soldier's combat boots, you can't see things the same way as someone who has. This idea was emphasized by Webb's campaign symbol, his son's combat boots.



For the 70% of Americans who disapprove of Bush's handling of the war in Iraq (Newsweek Poll conducted by Princeton Survey Research Associates International. Jan. 17-18, 2007), this is the sort of perspective and leadership needed.

Stay tuned for more from James H. Webb. He undoubtedly has more to say.

Share the Love -- Like Screaming Teenagers at a Beatles Concert

Okay, well maybe not that fanatical, but all the same, here's our chance to acknowledge some great female bloggers. Heather at One Woman's World is hosting the Share the Love Blog Awards. I am nominating and will be voting for several of my favorite bloggers and encourage you to do the same. Just click here to go to the One Woman's World Share the Love Blog Awards page and learn how.

Weekend Inspiration

Feeling overwhelmed? Too much on your "To Do" list?

Cruise on over to Cooks on the Coast, a military mommy blog, and check out "Timeline of an international move" about their recent international move over the holidays . . .

After reading this, my laundry pile looks so much smaller.

Thank Goodness They Won't Know What She's Saying -- Part of the Thanks Giving Series

Thank goodness most people wouldn't be able to decipher what my 18-month-old, rosy-cheeked, blond-haired little cherub was saying today. Today, all day, she ran around my quaint suburban house saying repeatedly, "Oh Sh_t!"

Drop the spoon. "Oh Sh_t!" Toy fell down. "Oh Sh_t!" Looking for something. "Oh Sh_t!"

All day long.

It is her Daddy's favorite expletive. Coincidence? I think not.

Ah yes. We discussed this. Did he listen? Hmmmm.

This is certainly not a phrase my little rosebud learned from me. Here's the smoking gun: "Sh_t" is positively, absolutely my least favorite word in the English language, and perhaps in any other language in which it exists as well.

Recently someone commented on our "cute" Christmas card and asked, "And how did you ever get your husband to dress up like that?" Well, he was all for dressing up, but trust me I would so trade the picture of him in the giant mouse costume for not teaching our baby to say, "Oh Sh_t!"

For now, I'll just have to settle for the fact that her bad language is largely unintelligible, our saving grace.

Family Kicked Off Plane After Toddler's Tantrum

(The Wacky Wednesday post comes a day early this week. The following was just too good to pass up.)

From Yahoo! News
Toddler's temper ousts family from plane
By JIM ELLIS, Associated Press Writer
Tue Jan 23, 12:54 PM ET

ORLANDO, Fla. - AirTran Airways on Tuesday defended its decision to remove a Massachusetts couple from a flight after their crying 3-year-old daughter refused to take her seat before takeoff . . .

Toddler Files Tuesday -- Little Miss Dispose All

Last week the younger of my 18-month-old twins watched me cleaning the living room and decided to help. As I picked up things and threw them away, she found a crumb of food on the floor, picked it up, came to where I was and threw it into the trash can.

This astounded me and I praised her mightily. (I thought I would have to wait until they were pre-teens to have them help with the housework.)

Little did I realize the coming consequence of my actions. She is so pleased with her rubbish ridding skills that she has become Little Miss Dispose All. She buzzed around the trash can repeatedly today, and I had to keep waiving her off. Throwing stuff away came easily, but the mental discernment to make the distinction of what is to be thrown away and what isn't it is more difficult.

Today she picked up a flashcard with a picture of a truck and, before I could stop her, dumped it into the trash.

"No, no," I told her. "We don't throw away our toys."

She was unfazed.

"The toy is gone now. We threw it in the trash."

Yeah, who cares?

"Do you know what happens to things we throw in the trash? A big truck comes and picks them up and takes them away."

"Yeah," she said as if she understood every word.

"It takes them away, and they bury them."

"Yeah," she said again, like she already knew.

"And sometimes they burn them."

"Uh-Oh!"

For some reason this struck a chord. I will throw my toy away, and the trash truck can take it away, and men can bury it, but whatever you do, just don't let them burn it.

Who knows how the toddler mind works. It never ceases to surprise me.


*Broom illustration is a scan of one of the aforementioned flashcards -- Picture Words Pocket Flashcards, by TREND enterprises, Inc., www.trendenterprises.com.

Mombot Monday -- Quick Tip

Having two precious baby girls who spent a brief little stint in NICU, I quickly learned two things: 1) keeping baby's things clean is important, 2) time is always in short supply. I like to clean fabric books and dolls every week or two, but if I waited until I had time to wash them each by hand or "spot clean" as many of them recommend, they would be relegated to the Island of Lost Toys.

My solution? Mommy's little lingerie bag doubles as baby's toy washing bag. That great little zippered mesh bag that keeps delicate apparel safe on the gentle cycle so you don't have to hand wash (Yeah, right. Hand wash. Ha ha.) makes washing baby's fabric toys simple. Toss them in, zip up the bag and wash on gentle with a small load of delicates.

*A couple of disclaimers: Not every toy can withstand this treatment, so choose wisely, don't overcrowd the bag, use gentle detergent and no fabric softener, and be sure to examine toys closely for any tears before returning them to the play circuit.

P is for President: A Political Primer

The media attention focused on the upcoming 2008 presidential primary and the already common use of polls to predict who might win could give people the impression that the winner of the popular vote would be the winner of the presidential primary. Unfortunately, it is not that easy.

For example, following state primaries and caucuses, Delegates at the Democratic National Convention will select the party's presidential candidate through a complicated process, in which some Delegates are obligated to vote for a candidate based upon primary election results and other Delegates may vote for whichever candidate they favor, regardless of the popular vote.

Surprisingly to many voters, the candidate who receives the most votes in your state may not receive all of your state's Delegates' votes. Some are allocated based upon the percentage of votes candidates receive in primaries or caucuses.

In some states, however, the presidential primary is only a "beauty contest" or "loophole primary," a non-binding primary intended to gauge public support for candidates. Participants at party caucuses may ignore the primary vote and elect Delegates pledged to support a different candidate.

Additionally, at the Democratic National Convention, the popular vote may be ignored by up to about 20 percent of the Delegates known as "Superdelegates," a group comprised of the elected Democratic National Committee Members, elected Democratic Governors, U.S. Senators and House members, and "Distinguished Party Leaders." Superdelegates constitute a significant slice of the Delegate pie and may "vote their conscience," selecting any of the candidates still officially in the race.

Add to the mix that states do not have an equal number of voting Delegates, but instead are awarded Delegates, by the Democratic and Republican parties, based not only on population, but also on how well the state has performed in electing that party's candidates to office, and it is easy to see why a candidate who is incredibly appealing to the general public may have no chance of winning the nomination.

The whole process is something of a quagmire on both sides. Unfortunately, the only way to have an impact is to jump in and swim.

Helpful links:

The presidential primary process explained by Answers.com.

Explanation of the math behind Delegate allocation for Election 2008 from The Green Papers.

A synopsis of the Republican Delegate allocation process from Republican Source.

CNN article discussing the 2004 Delegate selection process.

Democratic proposal pending to coax state organizations to have their primaries later in the season by awarding extra Delegates to states who have their elections later from The New York Times Politics Blog.

Shared Experience of Parenting -- Part of the Thanks Giving Series

How wonderful is the shared experience of parenting that it can make us breathe a giant sigh of relief when we realize someone else is a parent too. Like, oh thank GOD, they understand why I am wearing a T-shirt decorated with baby spit-up, sweatpants and a diaper bag.

Priceless is the moment you realize your shared experience renders you free to do things like speak in incomplete sentences so simple they resemble primitive hieroglyphics, a mutually understood shorthand language of the sleep-deprived parent.

When one parent says to another, "Teething," it is simply understood this means, "My poor baby is teething. She cannot sleep, bless her heart, so neither can I. I am here only to buy Infant Tylenol and large bags of coffee."

Wonderful is the fraternal order of parenting.

Picking the Spring Lineup -- Trying It on for Size

Following a little reflection, I've decided this about the blog. The free-form ramblings of my mind published online seem to lack focus. So here's the goal for Spring 2007 -- a little more focus. Consequently, I'll be zeroing in on the parent perspective and developing one or two weekly columns.

You can expect to see the following making frequent appearances as I test the blog waters:

Mombot Monday -- quick tips for parenting efficiency from a busy mom of twins.

Toddler Files Tuesdays -- vignettes of toddlerdom from a toddler twin mom. That is a mom of twins who are toddlers, not a mom who is a toddler or a twin.

Wacky Wednesdays -- wacky stories of interest to parents, children of parents and parents of parents.

Thanks Giving Thursdays -- with more of a parenting spin.

And the weekend feature, appearing whenever the mood hits me, Friday through Sunday -- Mom's Political Punditry -- political commentary from a parent's perspective.

I'll be trying each of these on for size, so to speak, so if you see something you like, by all means, let me know.

The Toddler Files -- No Dancing Please

Somehow I thought this day wouldn't come for awhile. I could envision it happening maybe as we chaperoned a junior high school dance, but certainly not now. This Saturday morning as our darlings sat in their highchairs eating homemade waffles, the Dooodlebops played in the background and Hubby and I danced. The younger of our twin daughters looked at us, squinted, shook her head and clearly told us, "No."

Perhaps this incident could be brushed aside as sheer coincidence, or attributed to her recent discovery of and overzealous use of the word "No."

Unfortunately, yesterday afternoon, as Disney tunes played in the background, I danced again, carefree and fun. That's me right? The cool mommy of the toddler twins? Apparently not. Again troubled, the same twin observed for a moment, shook her head and said flatly, "No."

I will interpret this as an early appearance of the inevitable, "Mom, stop it. You are embarrassing me."

I suppose I will react as any reasonably sane mommy would. I will continue to shake my groove thing 'til it just won't shake anymore. It should be a good lesson for the girls in learning to accept the rhythmically challenged.

Obama Forms Presidential Exploratory Committee, Promises to Announce Plans February 10

Obama Announcement via YouTube



View his announcement by clicking above, and get the scoop in today's article in the Chicago Tribune.

Visit BarackObama.com for more information.

Low Calorie Cauliflower Soup

This is a yummy, filling soup, low in calories, perfect for chilly winter days. While most soups leave me feeling empty in an hour or so, this one keeps me feeling full for hours.

The recipe is my adaptation of a Weight Watchers recipe and should still add up to about 1 point per one-cup serving for the Flex Points program.

Ingredients:

1 Medium Head Cauliflower (chopped)
1 Block Non-fat Cream Cheese (8 oz.)
1 Red Bell Pepper (chopped)
1 Yellow Bell Pepper (chopped)
(May substitute frozen peppers for fresh.)
1 32 oz. Container Nonfat Vegetable Broth

Directions:

Add all ingredients, except cream cheese, to large pot. Simmer on medium/low for 45 minutes. Turn off heat. Add cream cheese. Stir until cream cheese has melted and is well-blended with soup.

Pour yourself a bowl and enjoy.

Makes approximately 7 one-cup servings.

Political No No of the Week Award

This week I just can't let President Bush's speech on Iraq go without pointing out the the obvious -- "What took you so long?" His statements "Honorable people have different views," and "It is fair to hold our views up to scrutiny," must have garnered a collective "Duuuhhhhh" from viewers across the nation.

What was it, though, that finally led to this long overdue conciliatory speech? You know, the one this week, where he switched tactics from -- Let's club the Democrats over the head and drag them off to our caves to roast over an open fire -- to -- Gee, we're all just people with different views. Was there some serendipity with Karl Rove's departure from the helm? Was it the giant crushing blow the American public landed squarely on the jaw of the Republican Party in November? Or did he finally realize that the situation in Iraq is too dire to keep playing political games?

I would really like to know the turning point where the Bush Administration switched from -- If you disagree with us you are clearly unpatriotic, don't support our men and women in uniform, and are a pinko liberal -- to "Honorable people have different views."

This week the Political No No of the Week Award goes to President Bush for failing to acknowledge all along that honorable people have different views. Acknowledging that very important fact is absolutely essential to finding a solution to the growing problem in Iraq.

Vintage Frosty the Snowman

If this doesn't make you want to dance, nothing will. Just click the play button in the middle.

Friday Fun

Cold weather's a'comin', even to sunny Californ-I-A. Better bundle up and stay inside.

For anyone who has toddlers like mine who are simply entranced by Teletubbies, here's a fun link with lots of Teletubbies activities.

Teletubbies Fun

Picking the Spring Lineup

I've been toying with a few fairly regular features on the blog. I'm in the process of putting together a spring lineup, deciding what to keep, what to get rid of and what to add. If you have suggestions, I would love to hear them.

Muchas gracias!

Thanks Susan -- Part of the Thanks Giving Series

Susan and I have always said she has the other half of my brain, and I have the other half of hers. Very convenient, as when we do something half-witted there is always someone to share the blame.

When we met in school, we simply had to be friends. We had too much in common to not be. We were two farm girls in the big city, not that the city was all that big. We knew with a glance the internal dialogue that was running through the other's head when a professor did something ridiculous or a himbo made an ill-fated pass at one of our friends, or a himbo professor made a ridiculous, ill-fated pass at one of our friends.

We shared the same beliefs and challenges and endless hours of late-night studying over cheese fries and coffee at The Kettle. (It's a wonder we survived.)

Twelve years down the line, Susan is still one of my best friends. She's like a rock, never wavering. When a family health crisis turned my world a bit upside down a couple of years ago at Christmastime, she made sure I came to her house for Christmas dinner with her and her family. When I arrived, I wasn't a bit surprised to find her kitchen filled with all manner of people she had done the same sort of thing for. That's Susan.

So, here's to friendships that last a lifetime. Thanks Susan. I'll call you tomorrow.

Thanks Cool Mom Picks

I'm a winner! At least that's what the folks at Cool Mom Picks tell me. Recently, they notified me I've won a genuine hand-picked bag o' goodies just for posting a link to their Holiday Gift Guide on my blog. I had no idea posting their button would even put me in the running for such treats (So you can rest assured my opinion wasn't biased.), but WHOOOPEEE I'm glad to hear it now.

Can't wait to see what they're sending my way. I'll be sure to post brag photos of the goodies when I get them.

Thanks, Cool Mom Picks!

Political Yes Yes Yes of the Week Award

Photo by Karin of DoubleDutyDiary.

This week the Political No No of the Week Award is replaced with a Political Yes Yes Yes. I mean, after all, the world's not all bad, right? Have faith. This week I'm awarding a Political Yes Yes Yes to Bob Seger for his rocking new song, "Between." The music, rhythm and most importantly the lyrics ROCK.

And here's the political part:

"World keeps getting hotter
Ice falls in the sea
We buy a bigger engine
and say it isn't me," Seger sings.

Hooray for reality and promoting social responsibility.

You can listen to the whole song on the NPR.org web site here. Get ready to download. You're gonna love it.

In addition, to my Political Yes Yes Yes of the Week Award, I'll be sending a little of my hard-earned cash his way for this awesome song.

Rock on, Mr. Seger!

Thanks to Francie -- Part of the Thanks Giving Series

Francie was my mentor, unofficially at least in my eyes, at the first law firm I worked for. I knew instantly I would like her when I walked into her office and saw the Albert Einstein poster looking back at me, saying "Great spirits have always encountered violent opposition from mediocre minds," and the framed magazine cover emblazoned with "I don't think ladies should be lawyers." (Special Report on Gender Bias and Women in the Law, Cover story for the ABA Journal, The Lawyer’s Magazine, December 1, 1986) (Yes, someone actually said this, out loud, as recently as that, and he was, get this, a Judge speaking to a female attorney about to present her case in his court.)

Although Francie would probably never think it of herself, I saw her as humble, honest, down-to-earth and just so friendly, qualities you don't always associate with "attorney" or "law firm partner." She had the supreme quality of being able to joke about almost any challenge and always carried on without hesitation when dealt an unfair blow.

She is, hands down, one of my best examples of "Don't let the bastards get you down." And although I know in her humility she would likely say this is overblown, she is also one of my best examples of nobility, perseverance and compassion.

Thanks Francie for setting a great example and being a good friend. If it is true that what goes around comes around (and I believe it is), you've got lots of good things coming your way.

Oh No, He's Got a Hoe

In the steamy summer heat of the Oklahoma plains, yellow squash grew in my grandparents garden, to grand proportions. Despite their size, they were quite docile, so I never really understood why exactly my brother found them so intimidating. Perhaps it was their crooked necks or their bright yellow skin.

It never really seemed important until one day my young friend Amy and I found ourselves accosted by the typical younger sibling wanting to refocus our attention on something much more fun such as wrestle mania or monster truck rally, or some other such thing not at all appealing to two prissy grade school girls. Try as we might, we just could not convince him we did not want to play.

Eventually we retreated outside, where he followed and where we happened upon the perfect tool of persuasion, the yellow summer squash. Perhaps in my brother's mind it was somewhat akin to the giant squid, because when Amy and I each picked one up and turned toward him, he ran. And screamed. Like a girl. Now this was fun. Maybe playing with your younger brother wasn't so bad after all.

And so we ran, each with a bright yellow squash in hand, chasing him round and round the house, around the outbuildings, through the yard, up and down the drive way, Amy and I laughing all the way, with him occasionally looking over his shoulder to see if we still brandished our squash, the magnificent summer squash.

There was just one problem with our squash waving rampage. In this larger than life game of rock, paper, scissors we were playing, there were several things that would come out on top over squash. Something probably Amy and I should have considered. Then we wouldn't have been so surprised when he emerged from behind the house wielding a hoe.

"Oh no! He's got a hoe."

When we saw it we ran. And screamed. Like girls. And so he chased us both, round and round the house, around the outbuildings, through the yard, up and down the driveway, laughing all the way.

Political Spotlight of the Week

This week the Political No No of the Week Award takes a back seat to the political spotlight focused on the passing of former President Gerald Ford, the man who I, even as a budding Democrat, backed in my kindergarten mock presidential election. Can't say my decision was based on political positions, but gee he seemed like a nice guy. In all seriousness, I must tip my hat to anyone who is willing to endure the slings and arrows, incredible stress and never-ending work hours that the presidency brings.

Happy New Year!

After a brief holiday respite, I'm back, blogging away for your reading pleasure.

And the Winners Are . . .

The lucky winners of our Country Colloquialism Contest:

1st -- Karin of DoubleDutyDiary

The first thing I thought of when I read about this contest was a plaque that rests above the kitchen table in my Oma's (grandma's) house in New Jersey. It's written in the country German (Platdeutch), as opposed to the formal German (Hochdeutsh), as my grandparents were both born and raised on rural farmland in Northern Germany. So it's just perfect for the country angle of your contest.

Anyway, the text is written in "low" German, with very pretty script writing, and an illustration of a glamorous woman. So, until you ask for a translation, you'd never know that it really says:

This is my kitchen and I do as I damn well please.


2nd -- Jean

My mother would get exasperated with dealing with her six kids and the thing I remember most hearing her say was, "Sometimes I just want to get my bonnet and leave!" Guess the reason I remember it so vividly was because I was afraid she might just do it. I could picture her walking up the road headed east, going up the slight hill with her bonnet on her head and never coming back. Made me shape up!


3rd -- Jennie

Better to be pissed off than pissed on - until i had my son i had no idea how anyone would know...


Congratulations Ladies! You should be receiving your prizes soon.

Overheard at the Mall

"We faxed our list to Santa. So we don't have to wait in line, do we."

From the looks, several bedraggled mommies in the crowded Santa cue would have pummeled this woman with their designer diaper bags, if only they wouldn't have had to give up their place in line to do it.

Thanks Santa -- Part of the Thanks Giving Series

Dear Santa,

Just wanted to drop you a line to say thanks for your surprise appearance yesterday. I was beginning to think some strange sect of Christmas Krishnas was following us through Macy's, jingling bells and chanting, "Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas, Merry Christmas." A little dismayed by their persistent holiday spirit, I turned around to spy you waving your arms wildly trying to get my attention. If I had waited another moment, you might have actually taken flight.

There you stood in all your seasonal glory, beard disheveled, hat askew and slightly out of breath. "Merry Christmas," you managed to pronounce and then waited for our response. The twins and I stared at you, mouths agape, stunned by all the commotion and the crowd of people now surrounding us. Your bell-ringing posse alone must have numbered 15 or more and now customers and staff were gathering as well.

"Merry Christmas," I responded.

You looked at me as if, "Is that it Lady? I run through this store with my band of red clad zombie bell ringers, chasing after you, so your babies can have the joy of seeing Santa M. Claus, and all I get is 'Merry Christmas.' Didn't anyone give you the Santa M. Claus Guidebook that explains how to torture your children with threats that I am always watching. I am the greatest thing for childhood discipline since 'spare the rod and spoil the child.' I am the Grand Pooh-bah of the kiddy Christmas experience. And this, My Dear, is where at all begins."

The look in my eyes, must have said, "Yeah, sorry, I'm not into that."

Perplexed, you rather huffily asked if the girls could have some candy. To which I responded "No, sorry, but thank you. They're really too young for candy. It's kind of a choking hazard."

A choking hazard? Too young for candy?!!?!! Where are you from woman? This is the United States of America. There's no such thing as too young for candy. If you won't let them have candy, Christmas will be ruined. What is the point of Christmas if they can't have candy?

Your band of bell ringers collectively took a step back, as if they expected you might collapse from shock.

The twins watched you closely and then glanced at me as if to ask, "Mommy, is he going to be okay?"

"Thank you, Santa, for stopping to talk to us. That was very nice of you."

You spun on your heels and turned away in a daze, baffled by the strange reaction from this woman who clearly did not understand Christmas and her two mutant children who did not squeal in delight at the sight of you. Then off you trundled with your band of merry bell ringers to surround some other unsuspecting soul and bring them Christmas joy.

Thanks Santa for your surprise visit and may you have a very merry Christmas.

Truly,
Shannon

Can Can It Get Any Better -- Dancing Lights

From www.lightupxmas.com. Hours spent shopping online only to click on at least 37 items that said "Out of Stock" or "This item has been added to your bag and is expected to ship 1/30/07" (Oh yeah, that will be helpful.) have led me to this. I am mesmerized by pretty flashing lights. My conclusion -- Christmas shopping sucks big lemons, even online. More proof giving birth must have given me a big dose of reality. I no longer love spending hours at the mall looking for just the right strappy sandals. I would rather clean my house. How sick is that?

Just See Those Snowflakes Falling -- Web Funtivity

Here is a great way to while away a few spare moments and reminisce about those third grade arts and crafts days when the most dangerous tools in your arsenal were rubber cement and round-tipped scissors.

Make your own snowflakes online here.

Thanks to DoubleDutyDiary for the 411. What a blast!

Here are two of mine:

Mimi's Peanut Patties

This is one of my favorite candies. My Mimi used to make them every year at Christmas and, if we were lucky, at Thanksgiving. I think they tasted extra good because of all the work that went into them, standing over a hot stove and stirring . . . and stirring . . . and stirring. Oh, but they are so worth it. Try this recipe out yourself and taste the love.

2 ½ Cups sugar, 2/3 Cup Karo Light Corn Syrup, 1 Cup evaporated milk, 2 Cups raw peanuts, mix together in heavy three quart pan, cook over low heat 1 ¼ hour, stirring frequently. Add 1 teaspoon vanilla, 1 teaspoon butter and 3-4 drops red food coloring. Beat until creamy and loses its gloss. Drop from tablespoon onto waxed paper to form patties. Let stand one hour before serving.

Political No No of the Week Award

This week's award goes to CNN for their inappropriate focus on and repetition of their hard-hitting (not) story regarding the possible shift in power from Democrats to Republicans in the United States Senate. The real story is that a man, yes a real live person, Senator Tim Johnson (D-South Dakota), who is devoting his life to serving our country, is gravely ill. CNN jumped over that story, past several stages of logical thinking, and straight into the hyperreactive story that power in the Senate might change hands.

I suppose that is one way to get ahead of your competitors, by jumping past what is happening and reporting what might happen. Unfortunately, it is difficult to predict the future. In their haste to beat competitors, CNN has gotten it wrong many times in the past and apparently may have this time as well. At the very least, they have come across as ghoulish and so competitive that they are more concerned about sensationalism than reality and human emotion.

It is hard to trust a news source that repeatedly reports bad information in an effort to be first or draw attention through overblown sensationalism. CNN just took another step down in my list of reality-based news sources.

Internet Outage

Sorry folks, no news available for Friday because of an Internet outage thanks to AOL, the less-service-more-monopoly people.

From the Toddler Files

As we relaxed on the floor together before nap time yesterday, the youngest of my 17-month-old twins pointed to her knee and said, "Knee." Encouraged by my response, she pointed to her sister's knee and said, "Knee." Realizing she was on a roll, she pointed to her mouth and said "Mouth." Excited by her sense of accomplishment, she then proudly stuck her finger up her nose and said, "Nose."

My Kind of Cooking

I like to shop at estate sales. A couple of years ago, I came across a lovely little recipe book that was charmingly vintage, with front cover illustration, printed tabs and hand-written recipes. It was so lovely, in fact, I asked if they were sure they wanted to sell it. They said yes, so I carried my little treasure off home.

More interested in its look than its contents, I occasionally gazed upon it admiringly, but never explored it thoroughly until about a week ago when I opened it and found that the only things behind the basic cooking advice and recipe tabs were recipes for desserts and spaghetti and the wine guide seen above.

Now that's my kind of cooking!

Today's Special Feature -- The Virtual Cookie Exchange

Fun, fun, fun 'til Mama takes the cookies away.

The recipes I have posted for today's cookie exchange make me think of fun, the first (Doggie Cookies) because of the all the tricks and happy doggie smiles they inspire, the second (Microwave Pecan Toffee) because it comes from my Aunt Jean, and the third (Date Pinwheel Cookies) because of the many family memories they bring flooding back. Their sweet aroma takes me away.


Doggie Cookies -- Don't Forget Fido

Don't forget Fido this holiday season. These fun cookies make an apparently tasty treat. I can't recall where I picked up the recipe, but it has been a hit with our poochie pals.


Ingredients:

- 2 cups whole wheat flour

- 1 Tablespoon baking powder

- 1 cup peanut butter

- 1 cup milk

Directions:

Preheat oven to 375. In a bowl, combine flour and baking powder. In another bowl, mix peanut butter and milk, then add dry ingredients and mix well. Place dough on a lightly floured surface and knead. Roll dough to 1/4 inch thickness and use a cookie cutter to cut out shapes. Place on cookie sheet and bake for 15 to 20 minutes, until lightly browned. Cool, then store in an airtight container.

And in show of appreciation:

Apparently the appropriate way to claim something as your own is to rub your fanny on it. I will keep this in mind next time someone hits on my husband.


Aunt Jean's Microwave Pecan Toffee

Here is a recipe you will love for Pecan (or you can use almonds) Toffee. It's quick & easy.

MICROWAVE PECAN TOFFEE

First, butter a cookie sheet and chop or break up the nuts. Then these are the ingredients--

½ lb. Butter (no substitutes)

1 C. Sugar

2 Tablespoons water

1 Tablespoon white corn syrup

1 & ½ C. Broken or chopped pecans

1 pkg (6 oz.) Milk Chocolate chips

Melt butter in 2 quart glass bowl (takes nearly 1 & ½ minutes). I use one of those that looks like a big measuring cup with a handle. Add sugar, water and corn syrup. Stir thoroughly until creamy, like lemon pudding. Cook 4 minutes on high. Stir. Cook 3 minutes on high. Stir.

Continue cooking on high for one minute at a time until mixture is a golden brown (about the color of khaki). This takes two times on my microwave - may take more or less time on yours. If you cook it too long, it separates and is oily and sugary instead of crunchy! When it is ready, add nuts and pour immediately onto a greased cookie sheet. Spread quickly (it won’t cover the whole sheet). Mixture hardens rapidly. If it is too thick, just mash it down with your spoon. Sprinkle hot mixture with the chocolate chips, and spread the chocolate with a knife as it melts. Let cool on the counter for about an hour; then in the refrigerator for at least an hour. Break into pieces and serve.


Date Pinwheel Cookies

My great-grandmother, Mamaw P., passed down the recipe for these delicious date filled cookies to my grandmother, Mimi, who passed it on to my mother, who passed it on to me. Not only are they yummy, but beautiful too. They look like you just swept them off the baker's shelf and onto a plate. The spirals of date and nut filling surrounded by cookie always make me think of holidays and big family gatherings.

I hope your family will enjoy them as much as mine has.

(Note: My great-grandmother cooked with instructions such as a "pinch" of this and a "dash" of that and "cook it until it looks like this," so the recipe may not be the most detailed.)

Filling

- 2 cups chopped dates
- 1 cup sugar
- 1 cup water
- 1 cup chopped pecans

Mix together, cook until thick and cool.

Cookie Dough

- 1 pound light brown sugar
- 1 cup Crisco
- 3 eggs
- 4 cups flour
- 1/2 teaspoon baking soda
- 1/2 teaspoon salt

Cream sugar and Crisco together. Add eggs. In a separate bowl mix flour, baking soda and salt. Combine all ingredients. Chill dough 1 hour. Roll out. Spread filling. Roll up dough. Wrap in wax paper. Chill 3 hours. Slice in 1/2 inch slices. Place on cookie sheet 2 inches apart. Bake at 375 until golden brown.


Mad Props to Jenn for the Virtual Cookie Exchange

The great idea for a virtual cookie exchange was brought to us by Jenn of Jenn's Journal. Thanks Jenn!

For more recipes on the blogs of other cookie exchange participants, just click here.


Thanks for Visiting ZoKai

Click here to go to the ZoKai.blogsot.com homepage.

Under the Heading "Duh"

M-I-C-K-E-Y M-O-U-S-E!

Okay, the long sleeved shirt with the mini I can understand, totally. Sexy if done right.

But really, adding the yellow rubber boots and white knee socks? And the scarf, obviously because someone stopped the photo shoot and said, "Wait, she's dressed exactly like Minnie Mouse. Here, let's add a scarf and maybe no one will notice."

"It's a small world after all."


If this poor girl showed up at a party wearing this outfit, I would not make fun of her. The design person responsible for this "look," however, should be forced to drive six screaming toddlers around in a minivan for an afternoon with "It's a Small World" blaring in surround sound. If Mickey and Minnie can be singing it, all the better.



If, after my glowing review, you would like to purchase above outfit for yourself or someone you loathe/love, you can do so here. They actually have a special page encouraging you to buy this, eh-hem, "look" as a complete ensemble.

And yes, I do note the irony of yesterday's post regarding my girls' fashion sense, but wearing bloomers on your head so pales in comparison to this.

Shootin' Flies

I come from pioneer stock, the sort of folk who teach their children basic survival skills before they start kindergarten, you know just in case the teacher takes the class on a field trip to the woods and abandons them there, or maybe a rattle snake shows up on the playground for recess, or the cafeteria runs out of food and you really need to be able to know which part of the cactus to eat. So, it's only logical that along with our advanced survival skill training, each of us kids received a few little perks in the way of things you might need to survive in the wilderness, like pocket knives and BB guns and fully operational little motorcycles, at age five for boys and ten for girls. There's that darn glass ceiling again.

It was normal too for us to be left to our own devices to explore our surroundings and implement these treasured survival tools we had been given. In fact it was our mission. On any given weekend, my brother, cousin and I could be found riding our motorcycles through the gully on my grandparents' acreage or stealthily tracking down some hapless furry creature. Perhaps it was cruel of our parents to loose us on Mother Nature like that, in all our glory, but Mother Nature has a way of keeping things even.

It was not long after the three of us began our little adventures, terrorizing crawdads and blazing motorcycle trails through grassy fields, that a mystery arose. Uncle Joe's prized orange 1973 Volkswagen Beetle began showing unusual signs of wear, little dings, like little pock marks in its otherwise glowing complexion.

He couldn't imagine what was causing this apparently spontaneous phenomenon. For some time it had been safely parked near his home, away from prying eyes and offensive road debris that might be kicked up by inconsiderate drivers.

The mystery continued for a few weeks, all the while more pock marks appearing in the once flawless complexion of the little Beetle.

Then one day, as Aunt Kathy stood washing dishes and looking out the window over her kitchen sink, she saw it. My cousin, brave frontiersman that he was, stood BB gun scoped in . . . on the Beetle.

Ping!

Ping!

Ping!

Later that night, Uncle Joe asked him why was he shooting the little Beetle.

To which he responded, "I was shootin' flies."

Thanks to Aunt Jean -- Part of the Thanks Giving Series

Just when I thought I couldn't possibly write today, a little gift showed up in my email, the picture above, with a precious note from my Aunt Jean. That's how Aunt Jean is, always dropping a line or an encouraging word at just the right time. I'm beginning to think she can read my mind across the miles.

I can never feel sour when I encounter her sunny disposition.

So, thanks Aunt Jean for:

1. Being my best role model.

2. Living a life to always be proud of, leading by actions rather than words.

3. Showing me, with style, what a loving, devoted marriage looks like.

4. Telling me stories about our family I've never heard from anyone else.

5. Accentuating the positive, eliminating the negative and not messing with Mr. In-Between.

6. Showing me how beautiful 75 can be.

7. Ignoring my faults and finding my strengths.

8. Telling me about our similarities. It always makes my day.

9. Marrying a great guy like Uncle Bob and sharing your family with all of us.

10. Showing me a softer side of Papa as your big brother.

And the bonus, the $20 accidental gift from the Tooth Fairy (You and Uncle Bob) which I shall never forget.

Letter to Santa

Dear Santa,

My mom told me when I was 8 you didn't exist, but I knew she was wrong. You kept coming, right up until I got married anyway.

So, what's the dealio?

Look, I can understand if you're a little intimidated by Hub-a-dub's 6'8" frame, but he's a heavy sleeper. He once slept through our smoke alarm going off while I got up, found the source and eliminated the smoke, even though I woke him three times. Trust me. He won't notice you dropping off a few presents, especially small shiny ones.

So, I hope you'll reconsider and come visit me again this year. Here's what I really, really want:

1. Magic pixie dust to sprinkle on Hub-a-dub's head to cure his blindness to dirty messes and make him thoroughly enjoy cleaning house, mowing the lawn and pulling weeds -- in extra-strength please;

2. Flying diapers that fly right off babies' bottoms when they're dirty, taking all the poop and pee with them, the kind that fly straight to the dump without ever sitting in a stinky trash can in my garage;

3. Surfer girl hair, shiny, thick and long down to my waist -- wash and wear, dries in two minutes flat;

4. Bodacious beach babe body to go along with aforementioned surfer girl hair, think Beyonce meets Beach Blanket Bingo;

5. The good sense to appreciate having said body while it is in its prime;

6. Certificate for surfing lessons;

7. Maximum load memory chip for my brain, so I can store all the memories of my babies and family and never ever lose them or let them fade;

8. Stylish self-cleaning luxury SUV, built toddler-tough; and

9. Happy place distractor ray to zap myself with when I watch Sing and Dance with Barney for the 589th time.

Oh, and the perfect stocking stuffer, a T-shirt from here.

Love and kisses,
Shannon

p.s. I'll make sure the chimney is unlocked.

This letter was written in response to a Meme started by Tater and Tot. I'd love to hear what you have to say to Santa. Karin (if you have the energy after NaBloPoMo), Sonya (if you have time in the midst of your international move) and Kelly, tag your it!

Seller's Market

Hub-a-dub sometimes likes to sell CD's. He had over 600 when we married.

The problem with his little hobby is he "accidentally" sells my CD's and keeps his own. I've grown tired of losing my little gems from retroville -- The Beastie Boys, Til Tuesday, The Cure, Depeche Mode, Garth Brooks (How did that get in there?). So after his most recent trip to the CD shack, I asked to see his receipt.

AH yes, mine, yep, that one was mine, and "Oh My God! You sold my Billy Squire Signs of Life CD? The CD that my freshman roommate and I listened to like a thousand times my first semester of college? You have to go and get it back."

And so he did, bless his little soul, the same exact one, with the little crack in the middle of the front cover of the jewel case, lucky, lucky man. This Billy Squire Signs of Life CD he sold for $10 cost him $40 to buy back.

As a result I have shared with him this little bit of advice that seemed so obvious to me, but then again it's not like I have a degree in mathematical physics or anything, like him -- "If you don't like it and can't remember why you ever would have bought it, maybe you didn't. No more CD selling until I preview what's up for bids, please."

Of course this would be the same advice I shared with him last time he sold a bunch of my CD's. I suppose it continues to be a seller's market.

Simple Cinnamon Citrus Air Freshener

A simple recipe for do-it-yourself air freshener. I was a big fan of scented candles until I learned that many have lead in their wicks. Now I opt for other options, such as the following.

Ingredients:

Water
1 Orange
1 Tablespoon Cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon Nutmeg

Directions:

Fill small saucepan half way with water. Add cinnamon and nutmeg. Cut orange in 1/2 inch slices and add to water. Heat over medium heat until mixture begins to boil. Reduce heat and simmer on low. Be sure to add water as liquid reduces. Do not leave unattended.

*A dash of ground cloves can also make a nice addition to the mix.

Just the Funniest

The funniest story I have read in ages. Cruise on over to Call Me Soccer Mom and Die and take a minute to read Lizard in Labor. Just scroll down to November 16 and the big picture of the lizard.

Call Me Soccer Mom and Die will be added to my "Good Reading" list to the right as soon as I can stop laughing.

Political No No of the Week Award

This week's award goes to C-SPAN for making former President Jimmy Carter's mention of eventual funeral plans one of their top stories in "Capital News" online this afternoon. With all due respect to Mr. Carter, with laser-like focus on such crucial matters, who has time for discussion of Palestine Peace Not Apartheid? C-SPAN we know you can do better.